Disclaimer:

• I put the names in Japanese order. E.g.: Masashi Kishimoto, not the other way around.
• In no way I am saying anyone is a whore. Gossips are just like these.
• Also, although I wrote in Gossip Girl style, it’s clear I own nothing of it. Neither do I own Naruto, of course. Still, please R&R.

---

 

 

Spotted: Mr. Not-a-Fatso is out of town again. I never tried Kumo food but apparently it was good enough or Cloud Chick could make up for that. My Deer Friend spent yet another night at his friend’s sofa. Suna Storm is far from a normal fan girl. Pretty Man and Minnie Mouse were snapshot wearing matching tops at her shop. He was awaiting my table with his hair put in a bun. So cute! Dog Dude and Princess Pig’s make-outs were finally organized and I dedicated a gallery to them. Linked in the side bar. Free downloads available. Prince Fox-Frog and Snow Eyes had been shopping baby stuffs. They are novices so they spent more time playing around in the store than really picking up something necessary. You might have seen the pictures on Shinobi Times but I have more to share with you. Aw, what an adorable couple. I am 100% sure Hawk Jerk would be competitive once he finds out he and Best Forehead Forever have not as many remarkable scenes on our blog. Wait for it! Wait for it!

 

Yellow Alert! In the meanspringtime, one of Konoha’s psycho team was set up and out for a mission. Don’t get it wrong. I am not starting to post confidential information on this blog. But, a certain Bowlcut Baby, you take a Red Alert.

 

New Series! Last time we have spent columns on NS and his power over blondes—but then, I figured out US was probably mad at me because I didn’t praise him instead. So we would stop those partial stuffs. From now on, we will have Humor on every post. Those will give you some once-possible love stories. Yes, a Kage-Summit-Level Topic: Betrothal. Whoever came up with those crackships were really some Beta or Co-owner material! Please contact me!

 

Humor: I would always like to leak the full names in this column. Why? Because the truth is the truth. The most hilarious one was definitely Yondaime Raikage’s brother, Killer Bee, plus Godaime Kazekage’s sister, Temari. Seriously? Only the ST couple thought that they had hidden their relationship well. You couldn’t rob the fiancée of Konoha’s future head advisor. He is to be Shichidaime Hokage’s intelligence. You know that means Super Fox would hell the shits out of you if you dismay his brain. And no one really think Suna Rose would enjoy raps, right? And how would an octopus work with a kamaitachi? (Don’t ask me if it would do well with a deer.)

 

You know your chakra eats gossips.

Kunais and Shurikens,

Gossip Kunoichi

---

Team Kakashi had demanded themselves a Super S-ranked mission. The four of them together would have this done. Yes, the four of them—Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke and Sai. They needed to get this right once and for all and no one beat Team Kakashi with success ratio. This would be tough. Summon creatures couldn’t do any help. Ninjutsu, genjutsu, or taijutsu were all useless—they had to use miracle jutsu. They were to get Lee Rock a girlfriend. To stop him hitting on every female human in the world. They had been worried that maybe next time, Katsuyu-sama wouldn’t be spared, either. Gai-sensei was their Kakashi-sensei’s best friend and Lee was his best believer and that meant they had to take the duty. Besides, had anyone ever met a more badass team in the shinobi history? Gossip Kunoichi or not, this friend or ex-friend needed help and Team Kakashi had been known as a miracle and a savior.

 

Lee Rock wanted to flee away. The moment Sai said he wanted to join his training, he should have withdrawn. Old Team Seven made the title of new Sannin but the one bearing the most viciously genius ideas would always be the new bee, Sai. Even Sasuke agreed to let him be their brain. Now, he found himself confronted by the world strongest two Shinobis, who had sworn to take his life. He was never a coward and concession was never his thing but if the head of hospital was part of that evil plan, shouldn’t you think twice or more before getting into a devastating battle?

“Nice to see you, Sasuke-sama, Naruto-sama,” He tried hardest with his Nice Guy smile and asked extra politely, “Are you thinking of joining in my training, too? I have just finished 1000 push-ups. I could do another 1000 while you do yours.”

“Not necessary.” Sasuke said, coldly as usual. If you didn’t know better, you wouldn’t notice the effort he put to not sound like a killing machine.

“We are here for your goodness.” Sakura said, sometimes her inner self wondered what she had done to be punished to be put on a team with all these social idiots—one was stupid, another was resentful and would go insane anytime, and the other was weird and scheming unintentionally out of his ignorance—maybe she should have been recruited into ROOT and Sai should have teamed up with Sasuke and Naruto in the first place and maybe she would be the one causing a war and saving the world. There wouldn’t be the next Sannin then because she would be a combination of three alone while that alternative Team Seven would be the weakest team ever in history. “You can’t stand on your hand all day long and wish a girl would join you one second and become your happy ending.”

“Sakura, are you saying you will go out with me?” Sakura didn’t understand which part of her talk led to that kind of a conclusion but she didn’t have time to argue as she needed to keep the dialogue going to spare Sasuke’s murderous mode.

“No. Still with Sasuke. Him, over there. The point is, we know you are lonely even though you don’t say it. We hate to see you like this. If Sai could have dating experience, you shouldn’t be a forever-alone!”

“But you know I love you!” Lee said. A part of him died but he made it not obvious. How pathetic it was to have your love of life telling you she was to play matchmaker for you. He had turned to Tenten for that kind of help and his next option would be Neji, and then probably Super Ino as she claimed she had magic, but never Sakura. He was known for his optimism and exaggeration when it comes to his feelings for Haruno Sakura but he was meaning it and he had his dignity, too. He knew Sakura meant everything good and he probably did need this master team’s help but his feelings couldn’t lie. He was hurt and he had to let her know even if just slightly.

“I know that, Lee. I do. And I am thankful. That’s why I want to see you being happy. You should move on. I am not changing my mind and you deserve someone loving you as much as you love her.” Sakura knew she made a mistake. She always felt extra guilty when everyone was making fun of Lee’s singleness but she could never do anything. For once, she knew she had to be cruel and force him to let her go. He would never hate her or despise her—he really was the nicest guy she’d ever known but being in love with him would be wrong. That wasn’t an excuse but a fact. She belonged with Sasuke now. It wasn’t as momentous as she had dreamed but it was what they had and what they deserved. Likewise, Lee had a place, where he should be, and if she had to be the bad girl to make things right, then she would do that.

“Bushy brow, listen,” Super Naruto spontaneously came in to aid, hopefully, “Sometimes we have to turn around to see the sun.”

“Pardon?” Sakura was shocked by Naruto’s wise words.

“You told me that, Sakura-chan, don’t you remember?” That’s right. She told him after Ino encouraged her to keep faith in Sasuke and convinced her of letting Sasuke go on his journey and that becoming the head of a ROOT-like black op when returning would do him good. Seeing everything Sasuke and his friends, as he recently admitted, had done for Konoha and the world, everyone could really use a chance to turn around and face the bright shines. “My point is you know it’s not working this way. Why don’t you try the other? There’s no such thing as unlovablility.”

“Yeah. Even though you are ugly, at least you are a Jounin now. That fact could attract some women alone. And you are not an ex-avenger or a forever idiot, so you definitely could get a real woman.” Sai added, much to Sakura’s dismay but she decided to ignore that and she wished Sasuke and Naruto would do the same.

“You are a somebody. We are not children believing in fairy tales, but a somebody like you shouldn’t live alone and bear no offsprings.” Sasuke said, sounding reasonable. He didn’t want to bother with this kind of drama at first, but Lee Rock was someone he respected and someone shouldn’t live in hell. No one should.

“Come on, this is the moment you should feel so youthful!” Naruto was a little bit tired of waiting. Who could resist having the world best team behind his back to achieve his happiness? Stupid as Sasuke, he knew how to accept a real favor, too.

“Well,” Lee hesitated for a second and that second was probably the longest one to Team Kakashi members even though Uchiha Itachi was not there with his Tsukuyomi. “Ok! But you have to promise me you will all be energetic and youthful as well.”

“Deal!” Naruto agreed.

 

So the next thing, Team Kakashi did for their mission was to give Lee some lessons. Some real lessons. They thought, on top of everything, to give him a new haircut could be an easy and effective starters. Sakura definitely suggested Sasuke’s, thinking how girls all around the world had fallen under the spell of it but Sasuke, as the king of style, highly objected to the idea. That was his hairstyle, which might be his chicken-butt hairstyle, but that was his. Therefore, no one should even think of it. Naruto, on the other hand, would love to have his hairstyle replicated on one of his best friends. Then, both Sakura and Sai thought that was an ugly look on anyone. Sai, out of blue, said maybe he should shave them all. Not only to make a fresh new image, but also to get an advantage in fights. Sasuke laughed at the idea; the evil side of him could use that idea but the nice-boy side of him gave Sai a deaddly glare, shutting him up. Sasuke’s obsession with longer hair, however, started Sakura’s rage. When the four of them were busy deciding the best haircut of the year, Lee tried to stay calm but he couldn’t. That was his precious hair. His precious hair, resembling his respectable Gai-sensei's. He loved that hairstyle and he had already decided to give the next generation more energetic bowl-cuts. He wanted to shout at Sasuke, telling him his fancy hairstyle was too girly for his taste. He wanted to roll his eyes to the so-called artist Sai’s world most boring hairstyle. He wanted to take Naruto to his next makeover, making the Hokage-to-be as cool as him. Of course, he dared not.

“Okay, we are going nowhere.” Sakura spoke, suddenly realizing that was made another meaningless argument of Team Kakashi.

“Yeah, just put it aside. I don’t see him look as good as me just with my hair.” Sasuke was acting grumpy and feeling very grumpy.

“Don’t worry, Bushy Brow, after this, we could go to where I always get mine done. They offer ‘Icha-Icha’ during the session.” Naruto was still optimistic.

“Now, maybe we could teach you some manners. Like, how to treat a lady. Sai, did you bring any book with you?” Sakura chose another topic for the next lecture.

 

However, learning her choice of studying materials, there was no need to follow the duration. One could expect more useless advises to come, as well as more embarrassinly childish quarrels. Team Kakashi might be badass at many things, but dating was definitely not in their fields, which they miraculously never found out.

 

“Why?” Yamanaka Ino was the second victim of Team Kakashi’s stupid plan. And with her explicit objection, one could know the assumption was very true. “Seriously? I am dating a walking monitor. He’s gonna smell that!”

“Oh, please. Pig, I thought you two had a fight.” Sakura tried to sabotage, “Besides, you don’t have to go out with Lee. And Kiba can be there as well.”

“Please, Ino-chan. Lee needs you!” Naruto used his Mouth-style Talk no Jutsu, “We will treat you ramen! Hmm, on Sai’s money. He’s the richest bachelor now.”

“I can buy myself ramen. I work five jobs. But ramen and I are not going to happen.” Ino wasn’t impressed by the exchange. Naruto had forgotten from whom he learned that particular move. “Why anyway?”

“He needs practices. You are experienced, Yamanaka.” Sasuke calmly answered, trying to save anyone from nonsense.

“How do you even know?” Ino teased him, “Have you been stalking on me? And why not admit you’re also not an amateur?”

“Gorgeous, everyone knows Gay loves to read Gossip Kunoichi.” Sai offered his idea. He took notes that the four of them all called Ino very differently. Interesting.

“Freak, I told you if you dare to call me Gay again, I will—” Sasuke wasn’t known for his patience and kindness.

“You will what?” Sai challenged.

“Come on. We can fight later when we start training.” Sakura saved the world.

“One thing, do it and I am in.” Ino made up her mind, “Tell everyone in the world that Ino-Shika-Cho is the best team. I save your ass after all.”

“What’s Akimichi and Nara have to do with this?” Sasuke didn’t care who the best team was but he would never be easy to give in.

“Then be his practice counter partner.” Ino was also unreasonable stubborn. “Sasuko.”

“Okay. It works for us. No one really think a team of psychos can be the best.” Sakura didn’t want to know what was with Ino’s strange request but as long as they got her in, well, not like anyone would really believe Ino’s team was better than hers anyway.

“Good. I want that on Shinobi Times tomorrow. HEADLINE. Saying the four of you believe that we are the best trio in the whole world with THE PRETTIEST KUNOICHI.” Ino said, “And now what do I do?”

“We didn’t agree on the prettiest part.” Sakura replied, “Fine. It would just seem to be a prank show. We will bring Lee to you and do whatever you like. Try to have him make some progress. But don’t go too far. What he needs is a pure and sweet love not a perverse one like what you have with Kiba, okay?”

“As if you and Sasuke are so innocent. That’s it.” Ino mouthed back.

 

The following evening held a “date” of Yamanaka Ino and Lee Rock. Even though that was a fake one, the blonde made sure to dress properly, high heels and makeup, pairing with a semi-formal LBD. Her counter partner, however, didn’t get the memo. He showed up with his regular jumpsuit. Ino started to wonder how much education this guy needed when Lee suggested that they go to a Gong-fu movie—and on their way there, they could try walking on their hands or jump on one leg.

“BAKA!” Ino started to regret her impulsive decision. She should add something like “What a pity we don’t get to marry the beautiful Yamanaka Ino” on the statement Team Kakashi was to make. She tried to be nice, not wanting to make Sakura happy, or unhappy, “You should know Gong-fu isn’t for everyone. And exercising can be more of a burden to most people. So maybe not this?”

“But I know you of all people can take it. You used to join Gai-sensei and me in our morning training.” Lee did have a point. A weak one, but one.

“Well,” Feeling Sakura’s virtual laughter behind them, Ino spoke to defend herself, “That was when I decided I didn’t want to look as fat and not charming as Sakura. Also, even if I could stand some running, I might say “no.’ That’s what most girls do on their dates.”

“Okay, then—”Lee was going to share his youthful idea.

“When I said I don’t want to go walking on hands, I mean I don’t want to try rope-jumpings, either.” And Ino interrupted.

“But Gong-fu can still work, right?” Lee still held some hope.

“It’s not a bad thing. I watch them as well. BUT NEVER on dates. You should pick something more romantic. When Neji and I went on movie dates, we usually picked spy movies. No less action-ish but more emotional and suitable.” Ino explained, giving a good example from her experiences.

“How about you and Dog’s movie dates?” Sai suddenly talked, “Just out of curiosity.”

“Mind your own business! Sakura, add SMARTEST on the statement, otherwise, I am bailing out.” Ino didn’t appreciate the curiosity, though. “I know I broke the rule but from now on, no more names of other love interests in our conversations. It’s rude and against dating rules. Alright?” One distinctly particular thing about Ino was despite her gossipy and chattering tendencies, she rarely talked about her relationships. It used to seem like Neji and she had an agreement to keep silent no matter from whom the question came and now she’d still act like this when she was with the bragger Kiba.

“I got it. That’s for sure a good idea. I wonder why I never thought of it before.” Lee’s “naïveness” had gotten on Ino’s mood. “The name Haruno Sakura should never pop up in any date I have.”

“That’s right. Now coming up with something good for your beautiful escort tonight, please.” She said with a sadistic smile. No one would dare mess up. People once had a bet on whether Ibiki or Ino was more horrible. Lady Tsunade’s money was on Ibiki. That said a lot.

“I don’t really know,” He tried to be humble and careful, “How about coffee?”

“Coffees are not for nights. Caffeine can cost you dear. But that’s some improvement. Kind reminder, though, never think of bringing your date to Tenten’s. It’s where gossips are born. Understand?”

“I get it. And girls might feel uncomfortable when she tries to catch up with me, right?” Lee still held some common sense. Good news. “Then if coffee isn’t good, how about beers? Everyone loves beers, right?” Bad news.

“Do you even know you are a terrible drunker, Lee?” Ino thought Lee was making some baby steps in dating and it turned out she was very wrong. “I am good with beers. Sakura, too. Sasuke, Naruto, and Sai over there are all friends with beers. But you, Lee, prevent anything that would cause you to make a scene on your dates. Although, speaking of beers, I could really use one right now.”

“Really? I could get you one right now. Don’t worry. I won’t even have a sip.” Ino could see how Lee would try his best to woo a woman, but he should know how to read sarcasm.

“No, thank you. I am fine without beers. Now I think I should come up with something for us, otherwise, we would end up doing nothing tonight.” She assured him and lost in her thought. If that weren’t Lee, she would definitely ask for a shopping spree, on her counterpartner’s payment. Yet, that was Lee, so her idea would be a little bit too mean. If that was Naruto or Kiba, she could grab them to any club and they could survive. If that was Shikamaru or Shino, simply talking could work for her. If that was Sasuke or Sai, to be honest, she could just stare at their faces for the rest of her life. If that was Chouji—no, she would never date her brother. If that was Neji, well, what to do with Neji had miraculously never been a problem. They just knew as if there had been a sheet music for their souls to perform the tunes. Maybe Lee should find his own sheet music? She wasn’t the most spiritual person, but she never missed the feelings of being in love. What’s the point with this fake date, again? They asked for her help because they thought she was an expert but she now knew for sure Lee would get nothing after this. There was nothing she could give him. She, herself, was still stumbling on her way to find her happily ever after, as well.

“Ino, Ino, you shouldn’t leave your date hanging!” Sakura made an intervention and made it very clear that she enjoyed mocking at her.

“Sakura, SOS, do you have any idea?” Ino decided to let Sakura be the one wondering what could suit the situation. “Or do you and Sasuke have the world worst dates?” She also wouldn’t mind having Sakura the one on the receiving end of teasing.

“I thought you are the expert here.” Sakura was ready to have a fight. Some things just wouldn’t change. “Or are you just so desperate to know how Sasuke-kun and I spend our time together because you are jealous?”

“Hey, that’s not fair. I give you my blessings. You should know I am over him.” Ino was in her best mood. She was just contemplating about her defected love life and Sakura knew right where to put the knife and was not afraid to twist it.

“Kind reminder,” Knowing prevention is better than cure, Sasuke interrupted, “The ‘him’ is here. But maybe you two should focus on Lee, not me?”

“Teme had a point. Ino-chan, I think you can take Lee to Ichiraku. Ramen never hurts.” Naruto also tried to offer his clever idea.

“Any better suggestion?” Ino looked at Team Kakashi with impatience. She could have spent the night at the new-open bar with Kiba, who at this time probably had got higher than a kite. Yet, she ended up here, stuck with an idiot with only ramen in his mind, a frenemy being more on the enemy side as of right now, an emo thinking he could be grumpy for nothing, and a freakingly confusing weirdo never knowing when to shut up, who put her in a miserable date with another poor being.

“Go get a room, you two.” That was none other than Sai, who chose to exert wrong humor at the wrong time. He might have picked up the not-so-catchy phrase from those bizarre books he read.

“You know what,” Ino was very annoyed then, “I could really use a room, to store all your corpses. Now I am done with this. I am leaving here. The pact still counts though. Make sure I read what I want on Shinobi Times tomorrow.” Effortlessly rushing off in her heels, Ino vanished within a few seconds. Kami bless the person whom she was going to.

 

“So the date is canceled, right?” Lee recovered considerably fast, “Do you guys want to join me for training before going home?” He acted no less energetically and in fact he was feeling a lot better without Ino in front of him, serving as his date.

“Whose fault was that?” However, Sai was still confused. He was still learning about socializing. Gorgeous couldn’t just run off on them, right? That was rude.

“I see training can be a very good idea. Sasuke and Naruto, you two should keep up with Lee while I’d like to punch some senses into this brain if that’s even possible.” Sakura’s violent side apparently got summoned out. The night was beautiful. The moon mercilessly laughed at them.

 

Since the date night of Lee Rock and Yamanaka Ino ended up being a misery, Team Kakashi decided to never pick it up again. For one, a failed mission, of the world top four shinobis did sound pathetic to them. For two, Yamanaka Ino had forced them to make a vow. Last but not least, they actually felt guilty. When they were either happily leading a love life or emotionlessly enjoying themselves, their friend, one of the most generous and most sincere person, was devouring the failure they caused him.

---

Spotted: Hawk Jerk never disappointed me when it comes to competitiveness. This week, we caught him and Best Forehead Forever in matching clothes the whole week and shamelessly youthfully Instagramed at World’s Top Seven Spots. So convenient for them to be teammates. Don’t you think that’s unfair? I had been assigned a hella lot paper works ALONE and they got to shop for more couple outfits together? They are not the most irritating thing, yet. In the academy, Bug Bro was happily introducing his poor students to a special course and for sure it required his girlfriend and him dating at work. I am sure I didn’t take cypherlogy in academy. Unprofessionalism has never been exclusive to My Deer Friend and his Fan Girl, I guess. BTW, next time I see the Konoha one in Suna or the Suna one in Konoha, I will have to inform some authorities. Or blog it all the way—since you know the authorities may be... You should question if it’s necessary to have Cloud Chick and Pretty Man helping training some innocent genins as well. Genins on Team LR thought they were unfortunate. Trending: #WorkplaceRomance—as if all of us are so lucky. Where’s my arm candy?

 

And then, I just see my favorite fan! I am going to watch him over. Lately, every time I came across him, he was with a different chick. This is what everyone should do and what this blog will be thankful for. Pale Painter, if you wanna learn about socialization, this is your cue and your one and only source of knowledge.

 

Humor: We know Aburame is the noble clan of Konoha. So we shouldn’t have been surprised when someone wanted benefits from them. But Aburame Shino and Karui from Kumo would never pop up in your mind, right? Especially when we knew his bro IK would have personally taken that as an insult. Damn, his sister was US’s once-possible in-law. How dare anyone irritate that family? Probably because of this Redhead’s enough CCR on her own. Needn’t Momma and Poppa’s concern. Anyway the next idea was Samui. To me, I think they should have known NS is the one with blonde obsession. I thought that could be an item after I saw a photoshopped duo shot of them, though. Did I ever mention Beauty & the Geek has been my favorite show? I don’t know why it was canceled but I do know a Felicity-Smoak-Hot Nerd might not be happy about this spill.

 

You know your chakra eats gossips.

Kunais and Shurikens,

Gossip Kunoichi

---

Lee, Neji, Tenten, Shikamaru, and Temari were sitting in a café with a certain girl. That was another blind date for Lee. Shikamaru and Temari were a little bit more nervous than usual while Tenten kept calm and Neji resisted his urge to leave every minute. The one under the spotlight, one Lee Rock, wasn’t paying attention to the ongoing thing, though. His mind brought him to how this event even happened.

 

After the failed drill, Team Kakashi had been laying low key for a while. In the meantime, Lee got confronted by his own teammates. The three of them had really had met up for a long time since Neji just recovered from his injuries and illness and Tenten had been busy setting up her shop. And then, ever since Neji and Tenten started dating, Lee had to give them some spaces. The moment he saw Neji and Tenten approaching him, he was very surprised.

“Hey, do you two want to train together?” He greeted the couple, “Wait until I finish this application, okay? I’ll do 2000 push-ups to make up for you. They said if I don’t finish this on time, I can’t teach a team next year. That’d be very not youthful.”

“It’s okay. We just want to talk to you.” Tenten assured him. Not really assuring, though—because Team Gai was not used to chatting about feelings and all those things, they communicated through their fighting practice, and whenever a talk was involved in their interactions, it’d lead to something awkward and seriously undesirable.

“We heard about Naruto and the others. Did you really want to take on their paths? Their relationships are all complicated and take time to understand and accept.” Neji tried the straightforward way. He pretended he felt no uncomfortableness. “I wouldn’t stop you. But they are not smart themselves and all they could bring you is misery.”

“We know about how they asked you to practice with Ino. I don’t even care who brought up that idea. The four of them are at the same level of denseness.” Tenten said. “You should have come to us. We know you and we’d not push you to change.”

“Why do you want to do this?” Lee asked, forgetting that he should wonder who spilled their little secret. He realized that he seldom did the questioning parts. It had always been Neji’s and Tenten’s jobs while he and Gai would take whatever came to them. However, he found he had to more and more frequently these days.

“We are your friends! We can’t watch you suffer and do nothing.” Tenten said for herself and Neji. “Besides, if we let Team Kakashi do that, Gai-sensei would be disappointed. Both Neji and I had more experience than—” She paused. She shouldn’t have brought that up. Stupid! She blamed herself to herself. He was already upset! It’s none of his business that you and Neji had both got three relationships! And how would recalling Neji’s exes do anything good to yourself?

“Like I said, no one could follow their ways. You should do it in traditional ways. Join us for a group da—” Neji tried to ease the awkwardness only to find he wasn’t the kind that could easily talk about dating stuffs.

“We have found you someone. Go out with Shikamaru and Temari and us. Try things more mature and maybe it would work. Just be yourself.” Tenten finished the plan.

“Who would that be?” He asked more out of curiosity than interest or anticipation.

“They have many candidates. We haven’t got the last check. Don’t worry. It wouldn’t be hard.” Neji comforted Lee. Of course it would be civil and stable, knowing Shikamaru and Temari. Even if they went out of the box, it would always be more reasonable than the abnormal drill with a taken—by Inuzuka Kiba—Yamanaka Ino. No one would ever understand the mind state of that quarter and they used to think Might Gai was the weirdest sensei. “At least, you can have some real experience and make some friends. Be open-minded. Blind dates couldn’t be all bad.”

“That’s right. Come on. There’s a martial art movie premiere in Suna this weekend. You will like it!” Tenten offered a tempting bonus benefit.

“Do you mean the one starred Stone Lee? I am all in!” Lee had always been gullible.

“Deal. Make sure you don’t have work on that day. We will meet you in Suna. Temari would be there three days before. Feel free to arrive any time. I have a mission so I will just get there after that. Tenten and Shikamaru will be there one day earlier.” Neji fed in the details. Apparently, no one had thought Lee would turn this down and he lived up to their expectation. That was Stone Lee, after all.

“Okay! How do I thank you then? Stone Lee! Do I get to meet him?” Lee asked, “If so, I definitely have to do a series of the most vigorous and youthful workouts to show my sincere gratitude and my infinite respect.”

“You will. Suna is his hometown and Temari is from the royal family. It’s exclusive to those invited so you can have your time. And you don’t have to do anything. Consider it a favor from friends. But do take note to take care of your date.” Tenten started to worry that maybe Lee was too excited about the movie and forgot about the date.

“Sure. At least, that whoever loves youthful martial art movie, right?” Lee was used to looking on the bright side and that was too glamorous to have a dark side.

“I guess. Temari said you wouldn’t regret. They are smart after all,” said Tenten.

 

Since Shikamaru and Temari were dragged in his dating life, Lee felt as if he was the Casanova of the time then—the position once belonged to Neji and Sasuke, then Shikamaru and Naruto, and then Shino and Chouji. He had been going on countless, outnumbering Kiba, dates; even if they wouldn’t make him the lady killer, still, he definitely had built up his social network. That was Shikamaru and Temari, after all, the two most successful politicians well-connected to the whole world. It seemed that they had an endless pocket list, which would never run out of single female in his age group. Actually, Neji and Tenten had showed their support that if he would actually want to try with the same gender, they’d help him as well and there could be even more options in that case. What a support of a conservative Hyuuga. One should feel honored. Lee hadn’t given it a thought, though. Those dates were all interesting. But none of them felt right. Some girls did call him the next day and Tenten had promised those weren’t their duties. Still, he, who always considered himself a man cherishing time and embracing love, felt empty after all those dates and had been turning everyone down. He knew Tenten wasn’t happy, which meant Neji, Shikamaru, Temari and multiple comrades, who had volunteered to join their group dates from time to time, were not happy. Lee Rock turning down many girls sounded ironic and he knew he could probably have crashed all his chance every time he did what he did. However, he knew that was still the right choice. Just like this time, he was going to keep distance from this girl in front of him as well.

 

His decision for sure caused some consequences, some rages from some and some concerns from others. What no one would have expected at the moment was his decision to stick to himself would one day bring him his fair share of happiness. If Shikamaru had remembered how he only came to realize his responsible and his life goal on his own, he would not have agreed with this. If Temari had remembered how she finally chose to listen to her own heart and opened it to people around her, she would not have called all the single bachelorettes she knew. If Neji had remembered, not far ago, he faced his true self, finding out what he really wanted all these time, he would have believed all the trials and errors in Lee's life could mean something significant likewise. If Tenten had remembered how she never let other people tell her what to do, she would have had faith in Lee and the lifestyle he had adopted. If anyone of them had reminisced how once upon a time, they had fallen in true love, trusting their instincts, they would have withdrawn just in time and Lee could have been spared some awkward moments. Thanks to Lee himself, with a strong mind at the time, like his fellow comrades, he let his feelings lead him, wounding up doing the right thing.

 

“Why the long face?” When Team Gai was again about to have a serious talk at their training spot, Team Kakashi showed up and Naruto made a comment on their status.

“Temari was pissed. So was Shikamaru. Lee had once again turned down another girl. This time it was Kaze Daimyo’s daughter. Gaara had been the victim.” Knowing all of the mentioned ones, Temari’s protective big-sis side was the cause of Tenten’s hard time. And Shikamaru’s sadist side, as well. Leave it to them for the scariest couple.

“Wow, I heard she’s beautiful.” Naruto said, “Now I think everyone needs ramen!”

“Dobe, when is it ever a bad timing for ramen in your opinion?” Sasuke said with a visible sigh on his face, “This is the tenth day in a roll.”

“Why do you let him choose what to eat in the first place?” Neji asked. He thought Gai and Lee were insane. He thought Sai was masochistic. He thought Naruto was unrealistic. He thought Sakura was paranoid. Yet, Uchiha Sasuke proved he could be all at once and even surpassed them in the race of extreme.

“Because Gay loves Dickless.” Weirdo Sai had to learn to cherish his life more. “Don’t look at me like that. Ugly agreed with me.”

“Not in a romantic way. And stop nicknaming us! Especially not those inaccurate stupid shameless ones.” Sakura’s fist hit him while she preached him. Tenten was wrong. Sasuke and Sakura were the scariest couple.

“I think we will have ramen.” Tenten said, deciding it was when intervention should take place to avoid the fifth shinobi war as she saw worse was coming from this Asura and this Iranda. Kami, why did you create Sai and place him in a world with Naruto and Sasuke already existing? Konoha had definitely been cursed. That was probably why Karui had made it a big deal that she would never eat any Konoha food. Temari had gone farther with water when they first met and it lasted for quite a while. Bless those who were still interested in Lee.

 

And then there they went. Food did ease emotions so maybe Karui and Temari were wrong.

 

“Say ramen never fail to make my day.” Naruto said with contentment. “We should have everyone over. When are you free? Hinata-chan and I are all free from departure these two weeks. Can you believe this? Shikamaru insisted this!”

“Yamanaka said she’s not okay with you being a useless husband. I guess Nara always has to give in to her.” Sasuke shared his knowledge. “And you really need to grow some brain in this session.” And opinion.

“Teme, you of all people can’t say that about me!” Naruto said angrily.

“But it’s true. Don’t fail on Hinata.” Neji sent him a glare. Those eyes were always terrifying, byakugan-activated or not.

“Definitely always in!” Lee shouted in the name of youthfulness. “Kiba would always be in as well! He had promised to treat me some more youthful liquor.”

“He shouldn’t. I need to talk to Ino. Night shifts this week.” Sakura sighed. She hated night shifts because Sasuke was extra grumpy at night time and he just couldn’t find himself other hobbies aside from intimidating his girlfriend’s acquaintances. Around a hospital. Konoha Hospital was never known for being paradise-alike in the first place.

“Then no free time then.” Sasuke’s response proved Sakura’s prediction.

“I heard Chouji had been taking marriage leaves. He and Karui would be free.” Sakura switched the subject, “But I doubt they would spend time partying.”

“I am fine today and tomorrow. But I am also occupied. Until next Thursday.” Sai said, “I can’t give away my whereabouts, though.”

“I am okay. But Shino has a field trip this Friday till Sunday, too.” Tenten said, not forgetting to include Shino in the talk.

“They kept that tradition in academy?” Sakura asked out of curiosity. It was kind of an honor/reward back then as only the top three students would make it every semester. She had just been to one while Ino and Sasuke had never failed to be put on the list.

“Not really. It’s an aiding tour to Iwa.” Tenten explained.

“Aburame and Iwagakure?” Sai questioned, always the one quickly picking on anything might posing harm to their village.

“Don’t be surprised. Even Sasuke and Neji had gone hand in hand to Kumo.” Tenten joked. Yet, indeed, things had been so different after the war. Raikage had paid an official apology to the Hyuuga Clan, a specific one for Neji, as well.

“Naruto and Chouji were with them,” pointed out Sakura. International bonds worked miracles. Things with Sasuke weren’t that smooth but Killer Bee was quite over the moon to be introduced to another friend of Naruto’s and he even wrote Sasuke a rap song—the not-so-harmonious part was for sure when Sasuke refused to sing it with him.

“Not hand in hand.” Neji killed the joke. “Mission in two days.”

“With Ino? So quickly, again?” Sakura asked. Neji and Ino had been on a lot of missions lately as if trying to get that one-way ticket to ICU.

“Classified.” Neji shut it down.

“Land of Bread, right?” Tenten, offering her own tips.

“Confidential.” Neji frowned. Why was everyone suddenly caring about his work?

“So that had finally fallen on your shoulders.” Sakura concluded.

“I don’t think—” Neji wanted to stop all the leaking.

“It’s okay. We all have something to do with that.” Naruto interrupted. “Hinata-chan, Kiba and Shino had been there for three times since even before that stupid rebel.”

“So they are starting the killing orders now?” Sai asked. He didn’t know that. It made him unpleasant and upset. He didn’t know his question had revealed that, let alone detecting what he had felt, though. “Too soon.”

“Why shouldn’t they send Chouji, instead? He could eat it all.” Naruto tried some humor to comfort his comrade.

“Not funny.” Sasuke quickly reacted with judgment.

“Why didn’t Kakashi-sensei ask you to go?” Sakura wondered. Obscure missions were often handed to Sasuke. He had been to everywhere, from Land of Tomato to Land of Anti-Tomato.

“Few were known.” Neji answered. “And his team was not known for infiltration without a grand entrance.” Finally giving up.

“It has taken quite long,” Sakura showed her disagreement, “Three more corpses yesterday.” Strangely, every found dead body was submitted to Konoha.

“Shikamaru wouldn’t let anyone go.” Neji joined the discussion.

“Chouji and I had checked their force. Civilians, but tough.” Lee also participated.

“So you and Ino are there for killing?” wondered Tenten. “What a shame I don’t get a chance.”

“No. It’s still about intelligence gathering.” Neji answered carefully.

“Closer and bloodier, though, to say the least, right?” Great minds think alike. Sasuke definitely read between the lines.

“Well, when it comes to the killing part, I will make sure Shikamaru send me there. I had dealt with so many dead bodies that I deserve that.” Sakura now wanted to stop talking about the problematic missions her friends and herself had been doing.

“And me! I am the future Hokage.” Naruto didn’t know that was a joke and an ending to the talk, though. He liked the idea.

“Don’t abuse your power, Naruto.” Tenten laughed and said. “Maybe all of us could have a fair share, though.”

“No, I don’t think so. Like old days, when the time really comes, I will be there doing the job on my own as usual.” Sai said in a plain voice, making it hard to tell if he was upset or thrilled.

“Well, at least, we Konoha 13 always found a way to work together then.” Swiftly, Tenten gave the dialogue a conclusion, minding making Sai feel better. “Everything will be the same even if we grow up and kinda grow apart because some of us are too busy in Suna.” She also minded to give Shikamaru, who wasn’t even there, an attack.

“Now we speaking of Suna, why didn’t you like Yukata-chan, Bushy Brow? She’s very energetic and cute.” Naruto asked while raising his hand for another bowl. “Or Sana-chan? She’s very hardworking. And Idate also thinks she is hot!”

“He does have a wide variety of weird crushes.” Sasuke’s sudden aggressiveness shocked no one. It was just his tendency when it comes to Naruto’s friends that weren’t him—last victim was SAKURA. “He had one on Aburame’s woman.”

“Gay, you really don’t need to act all possessive.” Even Sai had caught that. He really enjoyed making fun of Uchiha Sasuke with his gayness.

“Freak, shut up.” Sasuke wasn’t aware that his reaction made things more ambiguous.

“We’ve asked the same questions. He wouldn’t tell. Can you believe that?” Tenten said, ignoring the usual childishness of Team Kakashi. “Really, what’s wrong? We don’t have Shikamaru or Temari here.” Concerning, along with frustration, was all over her face. Their friend needed to talk about the case.

“Those weren’t real.” Sai said, surprising everyone. “I read that blind dates could be misleading. In a shinobi world, it could even lead to an assassin.” With his explanation, it wasn’t all that surprising anymore.

“We are sure no one aimed at murdering anyone. But you are right. Tenten, I have been thinking that many dates and all the fancy stuffs were too surreal.” Neji used human languages to interpret the idea. He’d been mastering that throughout the years with Might Gai and Lee Rock.

“Oh, no. Not it! Neji, I am open-minded! I am willing to try difference.” Lee comforted his friends, “I am happy that you’ve all done that much for me. Maybe it’s my problem. So, how about next time? Maybe it’s will be it!” However, his over-brightness couldn’t delude Neji and Tenten and even Team Kakashi, except for Sai, was looking at him with pity in their eyes now.

“Lee, maybe you should stop this for some time.” Tenten sincerely suggested.

 

Lee didn’t answer. He had never been a good actor and he couldn’t find anything that was true but also positive. His silence also muted everyone. Neji thought it was unfair. Once again in his life, he felt destiny could call a lot of shots. How could it? Tenten cursed Shikamaru in her mind. If he was the genius, why couldn’t he find someone good enough? Sakura blamed herself for even starting the original plan. Maybe they should have let things work on their own. Now Lee was even more desperate. Naruto slowed down his eating. That was his favorite flavor but it suddenly tasted awful. Sasuke frowned. He paid Itachi a prayer, thanking him for keeping watching over him. He knew he had been lucky. Sai felt the situation was strange. Beast-kun did not look like himself and whenever someone acted out of character, it meant badness. Beast-kun and badness shouldn’t be linked.

 

“Yakumo-chan!” Naruto found a familiar figure at the reception desk and decided to distract the attention. “Good to see you!”

“Oh, you too, Naruto.” Kurama Yakumo greeted the hero. It was quite rare to be recognized on the streets. “And—” She didn’t really know the others. Of course, she knew about them, but they didn’t and she didn’t think they cared.

“This is Sakura-chan, Sasuke, Sai, Neji, Tenten, and Lee.” Naruto introduced his companion, “Would you join us?” Please.

“Okay. Nice to meet you all.” She sat down next to Naruto, wondering which was more welcomed, to stay or to leave. In the end, the fact that she still had to get a seat after all made the decision. It was also something she’d been expecting. Dining with someone.

“Don’t be a stranger. Yakumo-san.” Sakura friendly greeted her.

“You are also Dickless’ friend, Cupcake?” Sai chose a nickname for their new friend. He definitely had got the right memo, so the reason he never stopped calling Sasuke, Naruto, and Sakura those lethal ones remained unknown.

“Wow, that’s a progress, Sai. Then can you explain to me, why am I still Three-head?” Tenten wasn’t impressed. Three-head? He had seen her with her hair down! If not Cupcake for her, how about Sweetpie? Anything could do better.

“Yes! You call Temari Tinkerbell, you call Hinata Angel, you call Karui Sunshine, you call Shiho Astronomer for whatever reason you have, you also call Ino Gorgeous all the way and I am Ugly?” No one could beat Sakura in this competition of misery, which she preferred losing.

“Don’t forget who else you owe an apology to.” Sasuke was also a champion.

“I thought we are close. Real friends insult each other, don’t they?” Sai replied. “Like how Gay and Dickless call each other Teme and Dobe. I think that’s affectionate.”

“For a person claimed to feel nothing you seem to know a lot?” Naruto said, “I’d rather let it go, though. Yakumo, Freaking Sai here also loves to paint!”

“That’s great.” Unsure of how she should react, Yakumo answered in a plain tone but with a smile.

“Painting is definitely great.” Unsure about how he wanted to react, Sai answered in a similarly plain tone and with his signature fake smile. “Especially when it’s made a quite effective jutsu for me.”

“Easy, Sai, you can actually enjoy painting, you now?” Tenten shook her head. Something just wouldn’t change overnight, so why did she even bother getting a new nickname from this freaking idiot?

“Painting is also part of my jutsu.” Yakumo said, but then felt regretful. Her jutsu wasn’t part of a good story. She thought she shouldn’t ever mention it.

“Yeah, I remember! That was so marvelous!” Some of them had heard what happened with a painting genjutsu and were amazed at how Naruto could always focus on the good things. “You are definitely an extraordinary painter. Not saying you are not, Sai. Hey, I see! You two need to help decorate the community, drawing on the walls, gates, and fences or something like that. As long as we give you normal paints and you don’t exert your chakra, things can go well, right? Come on, can’t you see this is a brilliant idea?”

“Dobe, you are loud.” Sasuke’s face showed no emotion as if at the moment he was taking the role Sai, who was having a twisted smile on his face, a lot more real than his usual one, though.

“But you are also one of a kind.” Neji added to Sasuke’s words. It was no doubt that was exact what he wanted to say, yet unknowing of how to put.

“Naruto actually came up with a good idea. You two should really consider taking the offer. Otherwise, he’s not going to let you leave here.” Sakura said merrily, “And after that, if you two have time, the hospital can really use some aesthetics. Please?”

“Ugly knows about aesthetics?” Sai’s reply was confusing but that was the way he consented, “Cupcake, how do you think?”

“Well, I spend most of my time drawing anyway, so I guess I’m glad I can help.” Yakumo responded to Sai’s question, suddenly feeling a sense of belonging. That Sai over there was for sure a strange person. Just like herself.

“Wow, I can see something good is coming, right?” Lee complimented and gave out his trademark thumb-up. “I am pretty sure the two of you will bring us some of the brightest results of springtime of youth.”

“Lee, you are listening to too much of Gai-sensei’s speeches.” Tenten said and then shrugged. Let Lee be like this “Speaking of Gai-sensei, I have an interview later for the teaching thing. So I’ve got to go.”

“That’s awesome! We’re gonna train together once both of us are promoted, right?” And that was Lee, whose optimism was beyond imagination.

“Sure. That’s what I promised you anyway.” Tenten decided she liked how Lee had abundant supplies of possessiveness.

“I can walk you there. I have made an appointment with Ino.” Neji performed his concerned boyfriend role. “The mission. As for the training, count me in. And bonus, I will drag her with me. That means Shikamaru and Chouji will show up, too. Take that as a gift from me.”

“Neji, that’s something. If I get time, I’d definitely want to see that. But as always and like now, I have a lot of works. Damn, autopsy,” scolded Sakura.

“Crap! I forgot! Kiba is waiting for me! A new engineering starts today!” Naruto rushed out. Everyone shook their head. Naruto would never be anyone but Naruto. Sai and Yakumo would not have walls to draw on if he didn’t build any.

“Meeting with Kakashi-sensei.” That was Sai.

“Reporting to Nara.” The likewise unresponsive Sasuke. Both vanished without a second saying.

“How about you, Yakumo-san?” Tenten concerned.

“I’m going home. I’ll be fine.” Politely, the other brunette answered.

“Good luck at work! You will nail it, Tenten!” Lee’s enthusiasm wasn’t reduced the least bit. “I am going to do extra 500 sit-ups as best wishes for you!”

“No exercising after eating, Lee.” Sakura turned her head and reminded her friend out of nature and got on her heels to her destination.

“Hey, Yakumo-san, do you mind if I walk with you?” Lee offered, no less excitingly. One would wonder how he managed to be like that. “I’d like to explore a new route.”

“I wouldn’t mind.” In fact, walking home with Lee was like a dream. “But won’t walking be too easy for you?”

“You heard Sakura. And I can always work a little bit other on my way back.”

“Sounds incredible.” Yakumo laughed. Surprisingly, even to herself, unlike most girls, she wouldn’t find it hard to chat with the guy she admired. “Can I join you? I mean, I won’t be able to keep up with your pace but once we reach where I live, can you train with me? Just those easiest moves.”

“Of course! Yakumo-san, I am so glad to hear this. You definitely bare a huge amount of enthusiasm within you. That’s amazing!” Lee couldn’t think of the last time he felt this good. A new friend never hurts. A new friend, who would like to train with you, has always been more than welcomed.

The duo left the Konoha Mainstreet, strolling down the path to the lost compound of the declined Kurama clan.

---

Spotted: Pretty Man and Minnie Mouse took cooking classes together. Since I am pretty sure they would have tasted more of each other’s mouth more than their food, I don’t get it at all. As long as I get to eat better food at her complex, I guess I am fine with it. What’s I am not fine is that no one seems to ever invite My Deer Friend and Suna Storm to join them. Please save their boring marriage for peace treaty’s sake. Maybe they can join IK and YI on their coming ice skating date. All those falling and teasing are good for health at least. Question is would he even bother to change his shoes.

 

Picnicking can be simple. So you may just join UN and U-HN, alright? She’s already preparing all the food to feed the three of them. Plus-two wouldn’t hurt. Or just please borrow one of your best friend’s guestrooms. I understand why AC is the first-born in ISC trio right after I got a peek inside once. Cloudie, you are lucky! Nobles sure know how to have fun. Gonna visit AS’, HH and HN’s, or US’ next time.

 

Too bad my favorite supernova so far was sent to an unwelcomed mission. This is definitely NS’s conspiracy. Damn, you do nothing. What did you expect? I giving more attention on you would be meaningless and maybe troublesome.

 

Fine, for his fans, he’s spotted with his teammates. As if he wasn’t yesterday.

 

Humor: Helen of Konoha is none other than Yamanaka Ino. But is there only one chaotic beauty in the shinobi war? No, thanks, I don’t buy it. I personally prefer brunette over blondes. But Pinkette win the show definitely. Haruno Sakura had the most invitations coming to her because our Kage always got lost and ended up late to defend our kunoichis. Somehow all of them were sent back mysteriously before even reaching his office, though. All of the Daimyou’s first sons of the Main Five, Shibuki-sama from Taki, Atsui, Omoi and C from Kumo, Akatsuchi, Kamizuru Kurobachi from Iwa, Chūkichi from Kiri, Korobi, Yaoki, Shisho, and Kouji from Suna, and I would leave out those who worked with their bare hands. US, I did not put all these here for your Bingo Book. (I guess that was why they didn’t risk all of their strongest Shinobis in the first place.) I didn’t say that unlike normal cases, some of them were really attracted to our diamond ex-bachelorette. I typed lol.

 

You know your chakra eats gossips.

Kunais and Shurikens,

Gossip Kunoichi

---

“Kurenai-sensei, we are here.” Ino greeted before she stepped in Kurenai’s house only to find an unfamiliar girl of her age rather than the middle-aged sensei she’d expected.

“Kurama-san, right?” Shikamaru greeted. Ino looked at him in confusion and awe. So apparently all those times she pushed him to organize the shinobi data, he did have done some of his job even though she had caught Temari helping him multiple times.

“Hi, Yakumo!” greeted a hyper Chouji, who was met with Shikamaru’s and Ino’s wondering look. “We met once on a mission last month. I thought one of you appointed me to and the other had gone through our reports.”

“Hi, I am Yamanaka Ino. You may call me Ino. May I call you Yakumo, too?” Ino, showing her lovely and outgoing character, ignored Chouji’s suggestion and introduced herself, “and this lazy bum is Nara Shikamaru.”

“You don’t have to introduce me if you don’t want to. So Kurenai-sensei is out?” Shikamaru, known for his dislike for troubles, decided to ask the real question, as well as ignoring Chouji’s silly implication and Ino’s potential rage.

“Yes. She was called by Hokage-sama. Mirai is taking a nap. Just.” Yakumo answered, indicating that wasn’t the best moment for them to show up. Unlike most people encountering a full-on Team Asuma for the first time, she couldn’t care much about how this trio was entertainingly and weirdly matched.

“What kind of a mission would need the best genjutsu user?” Ino asked.

“The one we discussed earlier today. Your reports suggested that.” Shikamaru answered. “We couldn’t find anyone as suitable.”

“She’s good for the role but I am sure Yakumo can be just as skillful as her if not better.” Chouji noticed the upset in Yakumo’s face and comforted her.

“Thank you.” Yakumo replied. She might not appreciate lucky ones like Nara Shikamaru and Yamanaka Ino, but Chouji was definitely a kind-hearted angel. The last time she went on the mission, one of her few ones, they had quite nice duration.

“Sorry.” Shikamaru and Ino apologized.

“No more politics from now on.” Ino added.

“It’s okay.” Yakumo replied. She had been quite used to it. Konoha council, with Tsunade, Gai, and Kurenai as of late, had decided she was a special case. They hadn’t promoted her to chuunin, so technically she was still a genin or less than that but they had sent her to missions, where her jutsu could come into use. It wasn’t taking missions as an ineligible Genin that made her special in regard to Naruto, Sasuke and Sai. It was doing that as a weak and ineligible Genin. Her missions were just few and still low-ranked. Then that was it. Konoha had the best shinobis in the world. A former criminal, who could only use genjutsu, would always be a last-to-not option.

 

However, her coldness did murder the conversation. Team Asuma started having another inner talk. Yakumo watched, a little bit envious. They seemed to be teasing about each other’s pals. She had been to Shikamaru’s wedding, heard Chouji’s proposal on the same day, and read a lot about Ino’s affairs. They were super stars, after all. Everyone loved them and supported, shipped, their relationships. Sometimes she wondered if she would have a once upon a time herself. Probably never. Because she didn’t deserve anyone. Not when she was so weak and so controversial.

 

“Admit, Ino, you are just having fun with Kiba. So why you have to judge Shika’s and my serious ones?” Chouji asked, a little bit irritated. Ino had have to be a bitch—as much as he hated to say that unlike Shikamaru, he agreed with him—when it comes to their relationships. Who was she to say anything? She’s Yamanaka Ino. She had loved everyone and no one.

“What? What do you want me to confess? That I love you or Shika—” Ino replied.

“Who loves Shikamaru?” a voice interrupted from the door. It was Kiba.

“Chouji.” Ino answered and rushed to give Kiba a passionate kiss, peeking at Chouji even more furiously. “Oh, I miss you. You didn’t say you are coming here, though.”

“We don’t need permissions to be here. Where’s Mirai?” asked Kiba.

“Sleep.” Shikamaru answered, “Why are you here?”

“We are here to play with Mirai as we told Kurenai-sensei.” Shino explained, “Hello, Yakumo. Nice to see you again.”

“You, too. Shino,” said Yakumo. She had been familiar with the team coming in the latter. To her, they were a lot easier to get along with. She appreciated her lucks so far.

“Yakumo, Ino, Shikamaru, Chouji.” Hinata greeted everyone.

“How long have it been?” Ino asked, pointing at Hinata’s slightly-plump belly, “Why isn’t Naruto with you? He’s such an inconsiderate husband.”

“About four months. He’s in Land of Bear. Another diplomatic tour.” Hinata answered.

“You look nice. A little bit too nice. You should feed your embryo!” Ino cheerfully gave some advices, “Let me take care of you. Naruto is an idiot.”

“You would know better?” Kiba questioned her, “We should find out.”

“Who are you asking? I know everything.” Ino answered on her defense, pretending not getting the unwelcomed hint. “You should have already found out.”

“That’s nice of you, Ino-chan.” Hinata said. She was grateful that both Sakura and Ino had promised to take charge of the delivery.

“No biggie. Women stick together.” Ino said, “Yakumo, if one day you are having a baby, you should come to me as well!” Shikamaru and Chouji never understood how Ino could get along very well with other women except for the one they were dating. No, she didn’t go around provoking or bashing Temari and Karui in their presence but she got twice harder to handle in those cases when the three were alone. Even Daimyo’s daughters, who were simply alleged to be betrothed to Chouji was severely criticized by her. She didn’t even show as much jealousy or resentment toward Neji’s new girlfriend, Tenten, or whoever Kiba was seeing during their breaks. “I also promised Shiho, Temari, and Karui if they would let me, of course.”

“O-okay.” Yakumo was shocked at that invitation. Back to her former thought, she had to have a male counter partner first to have that kind of a fantasy.

“I thought you don’t like them?” Chouji asked. Shikamaru nodded in assent.

“Probably as much as you don’t like basic chips. Don’t talk about this. How’s school going, Shino?” Ino diverted the topic to the least noticed friend of theirs.

“It was okay. I am still an assistant. I haven’t met any Kiba in the class I taught so I guess things had gone smoothly. But, I did spot a Shikamaru.” Shino said, making his talk short enough to keep everyone interested. He had got more and more attention so far. Part of him wondered if that was because his friends wanted to make sure he would not give their children hard time in academy in the future. Another part of him definitely held gratitude for Tenten and Ino, both of whom had been helping a lot.

“A Shikamaru? Sounds terrible.” Ino commented.

“A lot better than an Ino. Save you a lot troublesome dramas.” Shikamaru mouthed back. “It was surprising when we learned you would like to teach.”

“Well, I just think academic time could influence one’s life a lot. Maybe with some efforts, there would never be someone like Sasuke and never would a child be left out of their generation’s first mission.” Shino answered. Shikamaru chose to pretend his obliviousness for the moment.

“Oh, man, why are you always so bitter about that? We had paid for that when those four assholes made their way to find us in the war.” Kiba replied.

“Shino was saving your life at that time, Kiba.” Hinata reminded him.

 

That was Team Kurenai. As Yakumo had been spectacled, they seldom showed affection, not even admiration. However, they stuck together; probably the only genin team ever had that many mutual missions in their Jounin years. They trained singly, mostly with their family, but they seldom fail a mission as they could amazingly complement each other. They were underrated a lot and people thought they were better off separately but after she saw them determinedly and seriously discussing multiple things, from missions to life goals, she could never agree with that. To her, they were even firmer than Ino-Shika-Cho and she knew Kurenai also thought so. She was jealous of that.

 

“Fine. Hey, if one day you are teaching history, definitely making sure to let them know how good our teamwork had been. By our teamwork I mean Team Kurenai’s.” That was Kiba’s way of saying thank you while giving Team Asuma some punches. So he also agreed with Yakumo’s unsaid thought about them.

“What? You have to teach them Ino-Shika-Cho! Especially if Shika’s and Chouji’s kids are in your class. They need to know they are not going to be a future Kazekage or Raikage but a real Nara and a real Akimichi, who will pass on our traditions! And tell them how good their parents and grandparents are. Better emphasizing on their Auntie Ino’s dedication to their weak fathers!” Ino argued.

“Can’t you keep your boring clan rules to yourselves?” Kiba said, “How did Kazekage and Raikage even coming up, though?” His second question was also for sure Shikamaru’s and Chouji’s. Perhaps also Hinata’s, Shino’s, and Yakumo’s.

 

“Kiba, how could you not understand your girlfriend?” Kurenai stepped in her house, responding to her student, “You two sure always remind me of me and Asuma.”

A silent moment was about to hit but then Ino said, “See, Kurenai-sensei says I am like her. That’s why Mirai loves me the most!”

“Don’t you know every girl is a daddy’s girl? She loves me the most!” Kiba protested, “That’s what Shikamaru always says.”

“I am sure he wasn’t referring to you, Kiba. Anyway, Mirai loves Hinata-nee-chan the most.” Hinata also surprisingly stepped in the war.

“You don’t see her as often as I do, Hinata. Her favorite will always be Shika-nii-chan.” Shikamaru seemed to find it not troublesome at all defending his role as Mirai’s most significant role model. He was pretty sure, in every single way, he resembled Asuma more than Kiba did, a billion times.

“Shikamaru, we’ve told you that you shouldn’t make her call you nii-chan. It should be ji-san.” Shino reminded him of the rule he and Kiba had laid down, “At most, if you do teach her in the future, she could call you sensei. And she said she loves Shino-nii-chan and will be very happy if I am her teacher.”

“What kind of a kid would like your bugs?” Kiba said, “She loves me and Akamaru.” Truth was everyone, even a cat-person like Sasuke loved Akamaru.

“Maybe Akamaru but not you. She loves me.” Chouji argued. “And she’s happy that will be assigned into my team in the future.” Thanks to Shikamaru.

“You guys, she’s too young to know what a teacher or a team is.” Kurenai said, enjoying the moments her students and Asuma’s students fighting over their daughter. “And I am sure she had told me Yakumo is her favorite.”

“Me?” Yakumo replied out of surprise. “Why?”

“You spend the most time with her and she adores you paintings and braids.” Kurenai said, not knowing her simple answer and her daughter’s childish adoration meant how much to Yakumo. A Kurama defeated a Hyuuga, an Aburame, an Inuzuka, a Yamanaka, a Nara, and an Akimichi. Her family would be proud of their heiress for once. At that moment, she somehow felt recognition from people she cared about for her personality was more important than from people she aimed at for her ability.

“Then I will start wearing braids.” Ino said, loosening her ponytail and started braiding. “Hinata, you should, too. We should compete fairly.”

“It makes you look like four.” Kiba teased Ino. “Ino-omouto-chan.”

“Good, then I have the least age gap from her.” Ino answered wittily.

“When I said you two reminded me of us, I meant it.” Kurenai commented, “All of you should bring your girlfriend, boyfriend, wife or husband here more often. It felt warm. Especially Naruto. I need to know why he doesn’t seem to take good care of my girl. And needn’t me to remind you the nth times of inviting Temari, right?”

“H-he’s always very busy.” Hinata tried to defend Naruto.

“I told you that could not be an excuse!” Ino said.

“Yes. Any father-to-be would do more than baby stuff shopping!” Kiba added.

“Let’s wait and see, Kiba.” Kurenai said with a grin. “Shikamaru?”

“Trou—Okay, I will.” Shikamaru replied. It would be really troublesome especially when Ino would probably tag along. The worst thing was that Temari would see how he acted around Mirai. He hated to let her see his soft and affectionate side. She would make fun of him and say he was being cute. Cuteness was meant for crybabies not a mature, intelligent, strong and beloved husband. He would feel like it had been twelve all over again and twelve shouldn’t have existed in his life. However, he would do that to make Kurenai-sensei happy and he knew Asuma-sensei would thank him.

“And Yakumo, you should quickly find one, too!” suggested Chouji. He was not all meddlesome like Ino but he did care for all his friends’ happiness especially ever since he had been with Karui, who made him feel as if he was the luckiest guy.

“Do you like anyone?” Kiba asked. “I believe there are still some good ones left in Konoha. We can help you find out.”

“Or do you like someone outside Konoha? We have Suna and Kumo experts here.” Ino added mischievously, eyeing Mr. Suna and Mr. Kumo, both of whom recently gained those unfair and unwanted nicknames from her.

“Ino.” That was Chouji.

“Troublesome.” And Shikamaru, muttering at the same time.

“What? I am referring to myself! Let me see, Yakumo. C is a gentleman but too cynical sometimes. A lot like Neji. Omoi is funny watching but not as good getting closer. As complicated as Sai. Darui is charming but I don’t think you’ll like him.”

“Why specifically?” Out of curiosity, Hinata asked. She basically asked that for a jealous and possessive Kiba as well.

“Yeah, even Tenten admires him a lot.” Kiba added.

“Really? He’s too much like Shika and Tenten is unimpressed by Shika even when he is in the chuunin vest.” Ino answered and made fun of Shikamaru and his affection for or accustom to that vest. He had secretly got two of them and had Asuma’s and Shikaku’s former ones in his closet as well even after being promoted to Jounin. Temari later told Ino that and she wished she had been there to see the priceless expression on one Nara genius’ face.

“She says Shikamaru is nothing like Darui when someone else commented so.” Shino answered as a close friend of Tenten’s. This friendship was shocking at first sight—not as shocking as Lee and Hinata’s, which was much to Hyuuga Neji’s dismay—but they had come to admit it was good. “By the way, that vest is not all good-looking so that statement isn’t valid.”

“You said yourself green doesn’t go with purple.” Hinata echoed. As if she had ever taken Ino’s fashion advice into consideration. One should see what she wore to her first date with finally-hers Naruto-kun. Sakura was written all over it. Then Hinata never minded Naruto’s obsession with ugly orange.

“Whatever. You don’t know that. I wish I could see Sasuke-kun in it. He would rock it more than any one of you. Enough for Kumo, though. Or Mr. Kumo would be nervous. But I don’t think Kankuro and Gaara would be in any way better options. The upgraded version of Kiba and Shino.” Ino kept on her irresponsible introduction.

“What? Are you saying I am like Gaara?” Kiba responded. “And by the way, that asshole will never get to wear it.” He did take offense to Ino’s fangirl remark.

“We all know you are like Kankuro instead.” Shino pointed out the obviousness.

“And I think Sasuke is more like Gaara.” Hinata took time to mock at Ino.

“Yeah, even they said so.” Chouji agreed.

“That was because their other choice was to resemble Naruto!” Ino argued.

“Then that means Shino is not like Gaara, who’s either like Naruto or Uchiha Sasuke.” Shikamaru won.

 

During the conversation, Yakumo, who was supposed to be the reason that started, stayed silent. She watched the pack arguing/joking, feeling weirdly relaxed. According to her knowledge and experience, normal people did not judging, even if harmlessly, Raikage and Kazekage in that hilariously sama-less way. The one time she had run into Team Kakashi and Team Gai and the respective two senseis during an eating contest, which she didn’t know why Chouji wasn’t invited but the infamous competition tradition seemed to have been passing down, it was also like that. (Of course, Naruto did invite her to join and went as far as pushing Sasuke to greet her, with a smile.) Things seemed to be extra simple for these people in spite of all the complications in their lives. She felt like she was an inside-outsider in their clique. Even though it was the first time they met, Ino was no shy to show her hospitality and Shikamaru wouldn’t hide his anti-troublesome personality, either. However, although they welcomed everyone in, no one could ever be in with Konoha 12.

 

“Yakumo, hey?” Ino interrupted her pondering. She wore a cunning smirk and asked her next question as if she had found the new land, “Do you already have someone?”

“No!” Ino was the easygoing kind but would give people their hard times, as well. “Why?” She found all the others also had inquisitiveness and amusement in their eyes. So much for an inside-outcast.

“You seemed to get lost in your thought.” Kurenai said, looking at her most secretive student with a meaningful and curious smile. Kiba, Hinata, and even Shino were like open books and Asuma’s students were even easier to read. Yet, while she had known Yakumo for the longest time and had more personal and close connections with her, she could never know fully what that girl had harbored in her heart.

“Is it someone we know?” Chouji asked. It had to be someone they knew because well, they, or at least Shikamaru and Ino, knew everyone. They were the one sending everyone a final instruction and blessing before all left for their home after the Grand War.

“Naruto, right? Everyone likes Naruto these days!” Kiba guessed, “Sorry, Hinata.” He was not sorry, at all, to say the truth. Naruto and Hinata were supposed to be a good match but they were just too ridiculous in every aspect of their relationship. He would never waste a chance to have fun, so basically the sorry was the intentional part.

“Or Shika! He had been breeding his fan club.” Ino guessed, apparently forgetting the fact that people had put her in that community as well.

“Why not your Uchiha or Hyuuga? Don’t be selfish.” The he next to her risked his life once again. Ino and Sakura enjoyed making fun of his encounters with women, conveniently neglecting the fact that they had more admirers of both genders than him. Not like he had ever been jealous of them or of the admirers, he reminded himself.

“How about Sai? He’s on the market, after all.” Shino also showed his gossipy side. But unlike the others, he believed most people had a sense of morality.

“Yes, and Sai paints as well.” Chouji added with all good intentions.

“Come on, Yakumo, we can help. We don’t judge or laugh.” Hinata encouraged her.

“Yeah. That’s it. Aren’t Shikamaru and Temari having been setting up dates for Lee, recently? We can offer you some help, too.” Kiba said, “Hey, how about you trying with Lee? I am not saying you have to but if you really don’t have a particular interest, you should be open-minded!” Kiba loved that idea he just brought up. After all, when Yakumo turned him down once before—a mistake, he had gone to far, trying to provoke Hinata, who also declined him, and it failed to effectuate what he planned on—he had suspected she was more into the enthusiastic youthful type because even though his confession was cliché and lame, Bushy Brow training around should have been less eye-catching.

“No!” Yakumo almost yelled. “Fine. I have my own interest, okay? But it’s none of your business! Please forget about this.”

“Mommy! Yakumo-nee-chan!” Mirai showed up, coming to her rescue. “And—”

“And who, Mirai-chan, who am I?” Ino turned to Mirai in the hope she would greet her next. It already sucked when she wasn’t the first one.

“No, Mirai, we discussed. You should greet your future sensei first, right?” Shikamaru, being a genius, probably didn’t know he shouldn’t use all those big, not- toddlers-friendly, words and held faith that his future apprentice would inflate his rivals’ egos.

“What’s with that? Mirai, hey, hey, this is Ki—” Kiba rushed to her front a step before Ino and tried to make her do the right thing.

“This is cheating, Kiba. Mirai—” Hinata also wanted the attention for her.

Totally amused, Kurenai picked up her daughter and talked to her, “Mirai, why didn’t you greet the others?”

“Not know who first…” Mirai said, a little bit wronged. Kurenai then started to think if these young people’s obsession with her daughter had caused some trauma and pressure to her one-year-old precious baby.

“Okay. Just do it anyway. No one would be angry.” The mother encouraged the daughter. “Right?” Hints of harshness were in her cheerful tone and expression.

“Ino-nee-chan, Shika-nii-chan, Kiba nii-chan, Hinata nee-chan, Chouji-nii-chan, Shino-nii-chan.” Mirai merrily called each name and Shino and Kiba tried their best to hold the urge to correct her. It’s Shika-ji-san and Chouji-ji-san. And when you grow up, you will change it to Shikamaru-ji-san. Watching Mirai growing up and learning to talk, they came to realize why Ino and Chouji had always called Shikamaru “Shika.” And he said his mother was impatient when she was the person calling that name the most often. Temari had numerous shorter nicknames for the different occasion she had to act like Yoshino-san.

“Guess it’s about time I cooked you dinner. Can you guys be civil and take care of her for me?” Kurenai asked, or demanded. “And don’t forget to stay for dinner.”

“Is Shiho gonna be here?” Ino teased Shino, “I haven't seen her for life because you keep her occupied.”

“No,” Shino, like the others, had managed to block out all the shenanigans coming from Ino's super mind, “She has to help Tenten at her shop tonight. Foreign visitors are coming, which makes even her freak out.”

“I see. Of course. They are besties, now. Whatever.” Whether or not, Ino was hurt was uncertain, but she was for sure excited about staying at Kurenai's. “Despite that, Kurenai-sensei, I will stay! I miss your cooking so much! Kiba, you too, right?”

“Of course.” Kiba promised. “Hana is on mission. I don’t want to eat whatever old lady makes. Shikamaru, next time, send my sister and me out on the same days.”

“It’s not your call.” Shikamaru replied rationally. If he could ever assign the missions in favor of himself, he would send Yoshino and Ino to a decade-long oversea one.

Ino’s next statement made it clear why Shikamaru would have such an idea in the first place. “Shika can’t stay. He has to be a good husband going home and eating craps.” As she then decided she should say what he didn’t say. And didn’t even think.

“Temari is a good cook. Unlike you.” He defended his wife and kindly reminded his friend that she might not be the one to say that.

“You should check in the hospital for your ageusia or dementia.” She protested. “Chouji loves my cooking!” And she had a testimony.

“Chouji eats anything offered in front of him!” He had a point.

“Chouji is here. Not appreciating your comments.” Their friend had his dissatisfaction. It had always been like that. Shikamaru acted like Ino’s dad and Ino acted like Shikamaru’s mom. And both adults had made Chouji thanked Kami for having him born as an Akimichi. But he still cursed Kami that he had to live with the even worse knock-offs of them on a daily basis.

“Just call Temari and ask her to come here!” Kurenai took advantage of the situation and pushed Shikamaru to do what he should have already done. “Don’t use troublesome as an excuse. If you keep saying that, I will forbid your appearance around Mirai. I don’t want my child to look up to that side of you.”

 

Because Shikamaru understood the art of troublesome women, he had compromised. He decided he had to make sure Mirai would not be going to be anything like that with his influence. Temari arrived just in time for the next round of best babysitter fight.

 

“Are you sure I am here for dinner with some of Konoha’s best shinobis?” Temari raised an eyebrow when she saw the silly scene those people made and then there came a round of best country fight, which for sure would bring Shikamaru a lot of pain the following night—if he still got to stay at the Nara compound after this.

---

Spotted: Panda-sama visits Mask-sama and his sister recently. His retinue has rearranged—too bad, we don’t get to catch Doll-san at Motels this time. Ee, he takes Teacher’s Pal with him. In-law-to-be talks may be traditional in Suna. Water Man just dropped by for a get-over in US’s manor with Chakra Dealer. Good news or bad news remains uncertain. I’ll keep you posted. YI+NS+AC and AS+HH+IK fought over little SM again this week. So you see Akamaru gets more sleepovers in YI’s house than his master. Their acts could be very childish but that made US+UN+HS push their Pervert-sensei into dating. I personally do support the idea since they could at least have him fulfill his duty as Kami’s gift for Kunoichis. Miss-sama, for sure, is happy. And then Sparrow and Turtle also get along well. Konoha Zoo rules!

 

Meanwhile in Oto Zoo, we caught a pharmacist and a nurse studying together. We don’t know what the subject was but they did have to catch up with their kouhais in Romance 101. Don’t lose to US and HS in ninjutsu and love. That definitely sounds very pathetic. Credited to late SA for that advice. It has done a lot good to my blog.

 

Humor: I got numerous hates last week for saying Yamanaka Ino is Helen of Konoha. I highly suspect some of them were from UN-dattebayo. So, you’d rather have your wife being the objective of men’s adoration? Here’s why she was HoK. Even though she didn’t get the most proposals, hers lingered the Kage’s desk for the longest. Darui, the recent Raikage, Kankuro, Gaara’s brother and guard, Kamizuru Jibachi, clan head of the said clan, and Houzuki Mangetsu, another clan head. Do I have to tell you all of them have Kage bloods? But Yamanaka Ino was like Blair Waldorf. She could be the Queen Bee but not a real queen. As a political scientist, I think she dug her own grave—when she didn’t do commitment, men become competitive whether they really liked her or not. Helen is not just about look or popularity but influence. I like the dynamic of DaruIno and KankuIno because siblings in bond become siblings by law would be perfect. Sorry-sama and Doll-san wouldn’t agree with me, though. You know they have their own BAEs then. One was even pregnant.

 

You know your chakra eats gossips.

Kunais and Shurikens,

Gossip Kunoichi

---

“So what else do I miss the past week?” After the meal, which the best Ino-Shika-Cho and Suna visitors were having, Temari started a conversation, “Is everyone doing alright?”

“Well, most things stay the same. What’s different is that you saw Shika and Chouji becoming so uxorious. Don’t be ungrateful. The others are likewise. Everyone is about relationships recently. Kinda disappointing.” Ino told Temari a certain Konoha confidential secrets.

“I thought you and Kiba are not less lovey-dovey.” Temari asked. Her voice showed her concern, not the usual cynics she gave Ino.

“Part of that was true. Part of that was meant to assure Shika and Chouji. Part of that was not what it seems like. Kiba and I, we are just fooling around, to be honest. Life is short. We have taken it hard before and now it’s time for party. Sorry to break your bubbles.” Unexpectedly, Ino was very honest with Temari. She would never admit but Temari was like the sister she never had. She could tell it wasn’t just her. They were lucky to become soul-sister-in-laws.

“Well, that’s part of life, Ino.” Temari wouldn’t give her a hug all of a sudden. Neither would she lie to make her feel better. Temari, however, would do just what she needed. Like changing the topic, “How about Mirai?”

“She’s a sweetheart. Beautiful and strong. Kurenai-sensei has been laughing more and more after she was born. Yakumo said that sometimes she would even tell Mirai about Asuma-sensei behind us. I think he would be the proudest dad in the heaven. Wait, second to my father.” Ino liked to talk about Mirai. Her growth never failed to show them life could work miracle. Whenever she missed her dad, she would think of her and she would feel braver. (She knew Shikamaru did as well.)

“Don't forget about my father. Well, Yakumo is the girl I met that time at Kurenai-san’s right? Naruto said she and Sai are doing something phenomenal. I don’t even know guys use this word as well.” Temari went through her memory of the said girl.

“Trust him to be Naruto. Yeah, they are helping decorate the newly set up buildings and facilities.” Ino gave Temari a more understandable description.

“Sounds pretty remarkable. Pretty Konoha. Shall we take a walk? Maybe you can show me their results.” Temari was intrigued. Ever since she was engaged to Shikamaru, diplomatic tours have taken up her time. Yet, somehow, Konoha could always find a new way to surprise her.

“We shall.” Ino led the way.

 

They passed by the library catching Shino and Shiho left to grab a bite. They passed by Tenten’s, taking three coffees and one herbal tea on-the-go. They passed by Konoha Hospital, giving Sakura a coffee break. They passed by Yamanaka Flower, greeting Ino’s mother. They passed by the orphanage, providing with the herbal tea and insisting on helping Hinata submit some heavy papers. They passed by the Intel, making Shikamaru wonder how come he was made do all the works while Ino got to rest when he was the Chief of Staff. Ino was right. Most things stayed the same. Neji would always report in the Hokage Tower on time. Kiba would always show up with Akamaru from nowhere. Chouji would treat his team to Yakiniku Q after every meet-up. Temari and Ino didn’t talk much during the strolling, yet somehow the former understood how the latter felt around their acquaintances while the latter managed to show the former how her hometown was doing.

 

But Ino was also wrong—Temari knew that for sure. New people were coming to Konoha. New challenges were introduced to them. New relationships were also growing somewhere in the village. At Konoha Academy, Sai and Yakumo were chatting while painting. Painting had always been something giving both of them a sense of existence. And now, it linked them together, leading both of them back to the long-lost relationships between brothers and sisters.

“So you have drawn Hinata, Shino, Kiba, Chouji. How can you work so efficiently?” Sai looked at Yakumo’s work. They had very different style but somehow things went smoothly. Their drawings coordinated just like them.

“You are not bad, either. Sasuke, Sakura, Naruto, and another blonde—is that Ino? I thought Team Ten is for me? ” Yakumo also checked on Sai’s side.

“No, that’s Naruko.” Sai proudly replied.

“Are you saying you are putting Naruko on the walls of Academy?” Ino’s voice came from behind.

“Tenten said we should paint our comrades here. Naruko is part of the clique.” Sai explained with a smirk. No one bothered to know how he learned that.

“Tell me Naruko isn’t who I think.” Temari looked shocked and Ino’s single nod made her even more uncomfortable. Konoha thing.

“Fine, but remember to put clothes on shim, okay? Yakumo, do you remember Temari, the wife Shika doesn’t deserve?” Ino greeted the more normal painter.

“Nice to see you again, Temari-san.” Yakumo simply ignored Ino, making Temari felt impressed and thankful.

“Gorgeous and Tinkerbell, to what we owe the pleasure?” Sai seemed to have been trying to use more pick-up lines, recently. Ino wondered in fact for whom he paid the efforts. Some enviably poor one.

“Tinker-what? Never mind. We are here to see the murals Naruto had been bragging about.” Temari explained to Sai. “Seeing these, I get how he wasn’t afraid of boasting. Nice work, you two.”

“Thanks.” Yakumo answered with a big smile.

“So which one of you is going to draw me?” Ino asked.

“Well, it’s me. Will you do something to please me?” Yakumo joked.

“Sai, can you please draw me?” Ino chose to turn to the other artist.

“Gorgeous, I’d like to, but you need to be placed next to Shikamaru and Chouji.” If Sai had learned anything, it was never getting between two women.

“Who said that? I’d love to stay by Sasuke-kun. What? Temari, don’t look at me like that. We just look awesome together. Like two models.” Ino objected.

“Or Naruko. Seriously, he definitely based that thing on you.” Temari remembered a funny thing and shared her thought, “Or Lee. I heard about that little date.”

“What? Never put my name next to those of the crazy ones. And I need to find out who’s the one walking around spreading that information! There’s no me and the insane Lee, okay?” Ino thought she had handled everything. Apparently, someone would still risk their lives. Her top suspect was Sai.

“But Ino, I think Lee is less insane than you.” Yakumo defended her crush. To make sure it wasn’t too obvious, she added, “I mean I personally wouldn’t agree to go on a drill-date.”

“She has a point, Ino.” Seeing the look on Ino’s face, Temari burst into laughters.

“Wait, you also know about that? Sai, was that you?” Ino was furious.

“No.” His simple reply made him very suspicious and the weird sneer he placed on his face made things worse.

“SAI!” Ino wasn’t Sakura but she wouldn’t give in just because she didn't have byakugou. Neither wouldn’t she give up physical attacks.

“Wait!” Yakumo stopped her. “We have works here. Before we finish, I don’t want my colleague got hurt and unable to work.”

“You’re right. I am getting this ticking bomb out of here. Good luck.” Temari quickly grabbed Ino away, wondering whether or not Sail would fight a girl if the scuffle had really taken place.

 

On their way out, Temari and Ino could hear Sai show his gratitude and Yakumo laugh it off, referring to themselves as families. Things were mostly the same in Konoha, but some new bonds were not going to miss its chance to be made and prosper.

 

“Temari, you are such a traitor! We have known for years. You should be on my side.” Ino had a mature mind but she always resort to acting childish. Not to mention you married my soul-sibling, making you my soul-sister-in-law. Therefore, what you did wasn’t even more outrageous. Are you even a well-trained shinobi?

“Come on. That was not that big a deal. Everyone knows you were showing your support. And if there’s any mischievous side of it, you don’t get to be mad, now.” Temari could hear what Ino didn’t say but she was the one with a rational mind and she knew how to use it properly. “To make you feel better, I am telling you I think Yakumo likes Lee.”

“Just because she defended him? I would say she and Sai are an item-to-be. I had come upon them together so often.” Ino doubted Temari’s assumption. “Sai is more charming and this isn’t just my opinion. But well, she also spends a lot of time training with Lee, too. I don’t understand a thing about that girl, who claiming she’s Mirai’s favorite when everyone knows I am her favorite.”

“They train together?” Temari was quite stunned at the news, “She’s the girl for him. Seriously. Get them on a date or something. Stop asking me to arrange blind dates for him and some poor girls.”

“Temari,” Ino wasn’t as excited, “Training together is not a big deal. We are shinobis. Didn’t Gaara just leave us earlier to train with Lee, too?”

“That’s the competiveness of men. Sasuke and Naruto are also there, aren’t they?” Temari spoke with some sense.

“Yeah, and Neji would join them from time to time.” Ino thought for a second, “Do you regret your choice? Shika is never going to man-up like them.”

“If I dated Hyuuga, we would go out of sync anyway. No offense to you, but you see Tenten and he are meant to be.” Temari answered, showing no sign of regret or frustration.

“So are you and Shika. No need to worry about me. I like to know they are happy.” Ino genuinely said, reminding Temari of her own happiness.

“Then why not Yakumo and Lee?” Temari then asked.

“I don’t know. Not like I am Lee Rock expert and Yakumo is very distant around Shika and me. Mostly, me. I have no idea why. Hinata and she are BFFL now. Tenten bakes cake, specially for her. Sakura also invites her to do basic works in the hospital.” Ino talked with visible disgruntlement.

“Come on, you have me. If she treats you and Shikamaru the same, that’s definitely about Mirai. You two are acting like the over-possessive and overprotective parents she never asks for.” Temari played the big sister role, “Let’s just focus on how good it would be if Lee and Yakumo could happen. Don’t you agree with me?”

“Speaking of the devil.” Ino murmured and pointed toward the training ground, where they had unknowingly arrived. Lee, Gaara, Sasuke and Naruto were all there.

 

“Are you two joining us in the next spar?” Sasuke was most certainly the ultimate jerk and he never hesitated to show it. “I can take you both on my own, and what would my rewards be?”

“Have you been missing me, Sasuke-kun?” The so-called friendship between the Uchiha and the Yamanaka seemed to be flirty and out of place. Then people knew better never to ask a question. Uchiha Sasuke, the new rising Head of Root, and Yamanaka Ino, the Head of T&I would not be anyone’s best choice of enemies.

“You never change, do you?” Temari remembered when they were young Sasuke was already aware of his charm and used it shamelessly.

“Temari and Ino, training will do you good. I highly encourage you to join us.” Lee never lost any of his energy, either. Temari knew that was why Gaara always insisted visiting Konoha on his own in spite of the fact his biological sister was living there.

“I am done training with you nuts. Beside, I don’t get the appeal of training even for the least.” Ino recalled the last time Neji fooled her into training with those insane guys. The only good thing was that Shikamaru and Chouji were even more tortured.

“Yeah, Lee, you must enjoy your training a lot, especially recently with a beautiful company, right?” Ino regretted telling Temari that. Temari, my sis, that was obvious.

“Lee and a beautiful company?” Naruto yelled with shock, “Did you find yourself a girlfriend? You should’ve told us.”

“Or that could be your Hinata.” Sasuke said with an evil look, “You two are quite close, aren’t you?” He was lucky Neji was at the spot.

“Guys are dense.” Ino winked at Temari and spilled the beans, “It was Yakumo. Haven’t anyone of you see them?”

“I don’t know much, but a girl willing to train with you sounds not bad.” Gaara shared his opinion, thinking of his own experience. “All companies are not bad.”

“Just like us, right? I heard there’s this best four-man band audition somewhere. We should go apply.” Naruto just couldn’t focus. And he never ran out of weird ideas.

“Like brother, like sister.” Temari ignored the Hokage-to-be and spoke to Gaara, “That was what I told Ino. Now, you try to convince your ‘band mate’.”

“Lee, do you like Yakumo anyway?” Being the actual talkative one, Ino did the job for Gaara. “I don’t understand the whole training-together thing, which Neji and Tenten are so crazy about, but you are their teammate and you are obsessed with training, so what do you think?” Whenever Ino talked to him, Lee wondered why he did try to pull off a date with her previously. They were just so different, like AM and FM. Obsessed? Could that word be any more emphatically overused?

“Don’t pressure him, Yamanaka.” Sasuke somehow felt chatty that day, “Not every man has the ball to say those words.”

“Like the three-word-eight-letter I suppose you should have already told Sakura now?” Ino responded, with a mixed tone of teasing and bashing.

“You haven’t said ‘I love you,’ Teme?! You are so weak!” Naruto laughed at his best frenemy, “I say ‘I love you’ whenever I see Hinata-chan!”

“I assume most of us here do not do that because only you are a dobe.” Sasuke sounded sour and glared lethally.

“Boys.” Temari sighed and facepalmed. “Let’s not talk about the ‘I-love-you.’ Just how do you see her, Lee?”

“She’s definitely a good girl. One of the most energetic one, I believe.” Lee answered genuinely.

“If you are comparing her to Ino.” Temari chuckled.

“She’s also caring. I’ve seen her taking Mirai-chan around.” Lee kept going.

“Mirai-chan is mine!” Ino pouted angrily. Her obsession with Mirai was crazier than the combination of the new-founded four-man band in front of her.

“Can you nosey women not interrupt? I am trying to listen to him.” Sasuke scorned.

“Sasuke, that makes you sound like Shika.” Ino grinned.

“Bushy Brow, we have this good girl, very energetic and caring, here—you know what, you should date her!” Naruto let Sasuke and Ino minded their own business and gave the instruction of a senpai.

“I’m kind of surprised that you haven’t asked her out. I mean, you asked my married mad sister out, right?” Gaara said with a hint of glee in his eyes.

“Gaara, behave.” Temari knew she couldn’t just punch Gaara but she did have her big sister power over him in a way. Gaara even mused his breathing.

“I learned the lesson! I am no longer hitting on random girl I met. I don’t mean Yakumo-san is just yet another random girl but I think it’s better to take things slowly. Like I could spend time with her, getting to know what she likes and dislikes. Maybe try to go on a date one day. And when the time comes, I can confess to her.” Lee explained, making his fellows bug-eyed and mouth-dropped.

“Lee, you are in love with her.” Ino recovered first but she can’t stop giggling. And girly as her, she hated giggles.

“Idiot, go tell her all these. No, just go date her. I believe she also likes you a lot.” Temari reasoned, “Probably thinking of you as a good guy, extremely energetic and caring.”

“But I am pretty sure she would prefer skip the getting-to-know part.” Sasuke smirked. It seemed he was finally in a good mood.

“Are you sure? I could see Yakumo admire Sai, not me.” Lee thought his friends had lost their minds, “Like Gai-sensei said, girls are often into stern emos like you, Neji and Sai.”

“Hmm, that’s right. I would be more interested in Sai than in you.” Ino agreed. Sasuke, Neji and Sai were all A-plus date candidates. She was so confident with her taste.

“You can’t have Ino saying on behalf of the whole female population.” Temari tried to comfort Lee, “Let’s put it this way, what’s better than a girl choosing you over those stern emos? And I think ‘just dating’ isn’t a bad thing. You are not one of those disrespectful douchebags, so I believe you two will at least become good friends.” Out of nature and support for a good friend of her little brother’s, Temari gave her wise advises with genuinity.

“Temari, you are so clever!” Naruto apparently was amazed.

“Because she has experience.” Ino thought and went on, “But I kinda envy her, you know, Temari knows how to hold on a chance, so Lee, I think you should follow her example.”

“I am pretty sure you are not less quick on taking the chance.” Temari looked delighted.

“So I should go tell Yakumo-san that I want to date her?” Lee was still confused.

“Better right now.” His friend Sasuke answered and looked at him with amusement.

“Don’t listen to Sasuke. Lee, just think about what we said and I believed you will know what to do on your own.” Gaara, the real good friend, said.

“Gaara is right! Lee, true love always finds a way. That’s what Tenten told me on my wedding. Although I could feel she was making fun of me, but I think she was very right! You should trust what your heart tells you.” Naruto, the symbol of hope, did give Lee a lot of hope and aspiration.

“I guess that’s all.” Ino felt contented, in a way she did help Lee learn about dating. “Let’s leave you boys here to talk about all your gross thoughts we don’t need to know. Temari, let’s go check on Shika, to see if he finishes his paper works and is free for a date with you.”

“Can’t you stop meddling with us?” Temari rolled her eyes but followed Ino’s steps.

 

The two blondes headed to the Hokage Tower, where Shikamaru should be reporting to Kakashi at the moment. On their way, they kept chatting. From the latest fashion, which brought about a big argument, to the latest missions. They had never understood the trends in each other’s village, but they never failed to support each other with other things. Temari knew what kind of missions Ino received and despite her concern, she knew what not to ask. Ino knew how Temari missed physical battles and as a fellow competitive kunoichi, she knew how to say about her logistic works.

 

“I guess I should return you to Shika, now.” Catching Shikamaru stepping out of the Hokage Tower, Ino said goodbye to Temari.

“See you around.” Temari replied, looking at Ino’s eyes as if making a promise.

“I will. It’s not too bad spending time with you.” Ino said gently and then her eyes blinked, “Come to think of it, you are so much better than Karui. I have no idea what Chouji is thinking. If you see him, please ask him about that. Karui is just—well, to be polite, irritating.”

“I believe Chouji will be great. In terms of irritating, you are a lot worse than Karui.” Temari said, with a beam of victory. Temari grew up without any knowledge of girl code, and she would not start to adapt to it.

---

Spotted: Okay, so the last party at US’s wasn’t really his idea. As in all the leaked selfies, you could only see Prince Fox-frog, Best Forehead, Pale Painter, Princess Pig, Water Man, Chakra Dealer, Bipolar Tangerine, and Hello Kitty. It might hurt his ego to see his admirers having fun with his colleagues. Of course you get punished when you never do house works. #AndNoneforHawkJerk #NextTimeSnake To prove he’s not a loner, US brought HS to bowling. Paying some extra bills for the unintentional damages but they did laugh a lot. I think it’s good for him to enjoy a real teeny life and his girlfriend was being a good tutor. Yup, she taught him how to bowl. Finally, we saw NS and NT—yeah I know she hates that LOL—go on a date! They had a boat riding afternoon. Well, basically they sail for like one second and started lying down. Doing C.L.O.U.D.W.A.T.C.H.I.N.G… What can I do? Earth to MG-sensei, maybe. I miss the time when I used to follow Pretty Man and Princess Pig to sky diving dates.

 

Humor: Kurotsuchi-sama had shouldered the marriage problem for her girls. Mizukage, her now husband, was a good result. Daimyou’ sons were also options after the possibility of Haruno Sakura was gone. Do they have to be that persistent? The humor of the week (I am aware the past two weeks were boring; please blame the respective subjects) is—Might Gai. What? What?! What?!!? Keep coming up; I am waiting. Yes! That was totes creative. I knew Mask-sama was too perverse to be a good option. (We pretend we don’t know his fans exist.) But, Konoha, you give away your most handsome, fashionable, skillful, hardworking, generous, confident, optimistic, courageous, enthusiastic, passionate and youthful man? What a waste! I know you should keep your friends close and your enemies closer but your precious legacy should be kept closest to your deserted heart or you will die!

 

You know your chakra eats gossips.

Kunais and Shurikens,

Gossip Kunoichi

---

The two artists of Konoha met outside the hospital. That was the day they started on the work there. It was surprising even to both of them that they had made short work of the past ones. The fences, where cats and shinobis wander on, were now painted with different patterns, fun and vivid. The walls of Konoha Academy now presented the legendary Konoha 13 and many other familiar figures, whom children admired and respected. Then it was the time for the hospital, which Sakura had been expecting.

“Hey, Cupcake.” Sai greeted his partner.

“Let’s get this done as well.” Yakumo was always excited about their job.

“Sure.” Sai replied and required, “Is it okay if we work late today? I’ve got a mission in tomorrow and it might take three day or more. I won’t be able to work on this.”

“Well, since we are always more efficient than we expect, we’ll see when to stop later.” Yakumo didn’t directly agree to the request. She wouldn’t mind working extra harder but she hoped things wouldn’t take up her time because yesterday when she got home, she found a note left by Lee, asking her to meet up at the village park. She wouldn’t want to miss it.

And if they could finish this on time, she would still have time getting prepared for the maybe-not-a-date waiting for her.

“Okay. Ugly said we should draw something about defective beauty. She took scars resembling feathers for example. We don’t have to listen to someone ugly but I don’t hate her notion. What do you think?” Sai repeated what Sakura stated earlier.

“I thing the concept is lovely, to be honest. By the way, Sakura isn’t ugly at all. Why are you always picking on her appearance? Let’s me guess, you have a crush on the pinkette?” Yakumo always liked Sakura and she now liked the sound of defective beauty. That was like what she thought when she first decided to link her genjutsu to illustration. Even though her body confined her to the life of shinobi normality, she would still have genjutsu and the best out of it.

“What’s a crush? You know I am still a beginner with all this sentimental stuffs.” Sai answered plainly, far from the way most people would react when it comes to crushes.

“Do you want to see Sakura every second? Do you want to know what’s she’s doing when she’s not with you? Do you hate hearing other people talk ill of her? Do you hate seeing her cry? Do you see her smile when you close your eyes and then you just can’t fall asleep? Do you find what she says always has a power over you? Do you feel annoyed when she’s talking about other males? Do you imagine doing something with her alone? Those little things are signs that you have a crush on somebody.” Yakumo explained, accidentally letting some of her feelings slip.

“I don’t have those strange feelings for Ugly. That sounds disgusting. She’s, in your words, having a crush on Gay. Besides, you sound like a know-it-all. Do you have a crush on someone?” But for Sai being Sai, Yakumo would regret talking too much. Sai was indeed a good company.

“Sakura and Sasuke are in love. That’s not just a crush.” Yakumo laughed, “But you don’t have to learn the difference now. Let’s focus on the real importance. I like the prosthetic ballerina you are walking on. What gave you that idea?”

“I saw a living example on a mission before. Some people can be really optimistic, I guess. Maybe you can draw Lee try to stand on his crutch.” Sai told her. That was a mission when he was still under Danzou’s control, which he seldom talked about. However, talking about the brighter part of it did no harm as he felt at the moment.

“He did that?” Yakumo was shocked. Comparing to Lee, her will could be very weak.

“What I heard of.” Sai added, “I wouldn’t say I couldn't imagine, though. Konoha's Beautiful Green Wild Beast really deserves his title.”

“A beautiful beast sounds very conflicted yet stunning.” Yakumo pondered and said.

“Draw him. But given that this is the hospital, try to give him in a better fashion.” Sai advised, “No bowl-cuts and jumpsuits. We could try metaphors here.”

“Metaphors are nice but Lee-san doesn’t look that bad.” Yakumo said with a slight criticism. She needed to defend Lee.

“Well, if you say so. I am not an expert with men.” Sai’s emotionless responses sounded creepy at first, but now that Yakumo got used to it, she felt really comfortable chatting with him.

 

They didn’t say much more and started paid all the attention to portray the art of defective beauty. A burl vase containing 12 tulips and 20 roses was on one corner. Butterflies with asymmetric wings were flying along the roof. Yakumo did draw a naked back with scars in the form of feathers—Sai had to admit not everything coming from Sakura was grotesque and horrid. Yakumo had started on a puppet consisting of crutches doing martial to symbolize Lee and his motto while Sai looked at his blanks blankly.

 

“Everything alright?” Yakumo asked, wondering what stopped Sai.

“I don’t know what to draw. I had known a lot about aesthetic of death but the defective beauty, which represents hopes and dreams, is not what I am familiar with. Like I can’t just draw bloods on snow, I have to do something with those bloods, making them not horrifying and dismaying.” Sai explained. An artist lost his muse could be a big deal.

“Well, maybe you can take a rest. But it’s running late, I better finish my side more quickly.” Yakumo would like to help Sai but she would hate mess up portraying Lee. Also, an artist’s road was always a lonely one.

“I see.” Sai didn’t say much, simply staring at the wall in front of him.

Yakumo, on the other hand, became a little bit flustered. She had to draw the puppet flawlessly and she also had to get it done as fast as possible. Why did she just start working on that? Lee asked her to meet him before dinner and now there was only an hour left until then. If she wanted to get dressed, or at least get rid of the paints on her hair and clothes, she might need to be hurried.

“Cupcake,” A few minutes afterward, Sai called her, “You are not in your best status.”

“What do you mean?” Not bothering to turn around her head, Yakumo was trying to pick up a brush dropped on the floor. Okay, the green needs adding some yellow but where’s yellow? “Did you use up all the yellow paints?”

“Now, they are here. Let me hand them over to you.” Sai answered to Yakumo’s upset, trying to be considerate, “May I help you?”

“Drop your annoying smile for starter.” Yakumo was really desperate at the time. Somehow, she lost track of the composition she had in her mind, and the yellow wasn’t the right yellow. They might have wasted the right yellow making Naruto’s orange. Holy shit!

“My smile is annoying?” As if hearing it for the first time, Sai was looked puzzled. “I believe you should take a rest now, Cupcake. You look frustrated.”

“I don’t need you to tell me that!” Yakumo lashed out and regretted right after. No need to vent her frustration on Sai. “I am sorry. I think I am really not at my best.”

“What bothers you so much?” Sai asked, taking away the brush and the palette in Yakumo’s hand, making her to draw away the attention from the situation.

“I don’t know.” Yakumo replied immediately. And then she spoke the truth, “I shouldn’t be doing this right now. Lee-san asked me out yesterday, and I better get ready. Not spending time creating the perfect green to portray him.”

“I see we used too much yellow to make Dickless’ orange.” Sai understood the circumstances right away, “But I believe it’s okay you just use the imperfect green. There’s no such thing as flawless, right? I mean, we are the ones demonstrating what’s called defective beauty here. We should know better.”

“You can be right.” Yakumo took back the palette, dip a dry brush with the green paints, about to draw a string for the puppet.

“Are you sure you?” Sai stopped her, “I can find some yellow for us.”

“Well, my inspiration is right here. I can’t stop now.” Yakumo felt confident again and complete the line without hesitate. Sai smiled at her. A warm smile of a sort. “In the meantime, I think you should pray Kami to give you some, the sun is about to set, you better hurry up. I am pretty sure Sakura wouldn’t be happy seeing you leave with those unfinished blanks.”

“I am not afraid of Ugly.” Sai couldn’t decide if that was a lie. Yeah, that was a fat lie.

“I’m done!” Yakumo shouted in ecstasy.

“And you’ve done a terrific work. Who would’ve known such a masculine thing could look so artsy in your portrait?” Sai congratulated on her good work and said, “Now, you should go to see Beast.”

“Don’t you think I should clean myself up first?” Yakumo was again feeling down. “Can you inform him that I’ll be late? Use one of your ink birds? And then I can also come up with some subjects for you before I left.”

“Just go, Cupcake.” Sai encouraged the girl, “Guys hate waiting. I heard Neji once almost broke up with Gorgeous because she spent too much time doing her makeup. Gay is also never patient when Ugly is trying on outfits before their dates.”

“How do you know all of these?” Yakumo chuckled on what Sai said.

“I read those on Gossip Kunoichi.” Sai said with a taunting smile, “Some articles there are not too bad.”

“I see why they call you Freak,” Yakumo shrugged and said, “I guess I can listen to you for once. Can you promise to keep yourself alive while I am not here? Draw some falling cherry blossoms. Maybe. They will make Sakura happy and they are very pretty.”

“I will see.” Sai nodded to the suggestion, “Good luck on your date.”

“I never said it’s a date!” Nervously, Yakumo screamed and got out at once.

Sai stayed there for a few seconds and decided he was not going to draw cherry blossoms. They are beautiful for sure and the mythology of them fit the theme but he would find something else more remarkable, more glorious. Something that could match Yakumo’s fighting puppet. Therefore, he collected their tools and paints and left the hospital for where he left, about to pack for the mission.

 

When Yakumo arrived at the park, Lee was already there, doing split jumps with his hands. He didn’t see her.

“Lee-san?” Yakumo greeted first.

“Oh, hi, Yakumo-san.” Lee didn’t change his posture. “Can you wait until I finish this round? I am almost there.”

“Definitely.” Yakumo smiled, “And by the time, can we start to drop the honorifics?”

“That’s good. I will finish right away.” Lee gave her his signature bright grin.

 

Yakumo stood for a few seconds, watching Lee. He was sweating and his muscles were tightened. It was clear that he was challenging his limits. Yakumo decided she couldn’t just stand there and watch. She should do some exercises as well. Therefore, she started some warm-up dance. Not fierce, neither harsh. But she wouldn’t stop until he finished his parts. She hoped this would be able to show her support and adoration for him.

 

Lee noticed Yakumo start warming up next to him. He felt great. Like really great. It was hard to describe that kind of feeling. He always felt inspired when Gai-sensei joined him in training. Whenever Tenten and Neji started sparring with him, he felt thankful for having them in his life. Gaara, Sasuke, and Naruto were also his great companions but they never gave him that feeling. He felt he was breathing more rapidly than usual. His heart was pounding faster and harder. There were butterflies in his stomach and he started to see illusion of magnificent fireworks in front of him. Yet he didn’t feel tired. Instead, he felt even more vigorous. He neither feels dizzy—wait, he was dizzy, but that was not the kind of dizziness making people sick. Instead, he felt active but nervous.

 

Yakumo didn’t know what Lee was thinking but she could sense him stare at her. Did he find her weird? It wasn’t like every other girl would start performing warm up dances all of a sudden. She wondered how he saw her right now. She knew how she had always thought of him, though. She liked how he was always positive. She liked how he wouldn’t let hardships beat him. She liked how he treated everyone with passion and kindness. She liked how he stuck to his philosophy of life and lived every day like the last day. She liked the way he grinned. She liked his voice and his tastes. She liked the signature physical features suiting him perfectly. She liked him as a whole.

 

“Yakumo,” Lee stood up, on his feet, offering his hand to Yakumo, who just lost her balance and fell to the ground.

“Thank you.” Yakumo blushed.

“No, thank you for meeting me here. An-and,” Lee stammered, “Thanks for joining me."  How did it become so hard to talk to Yakumo?

“Don’t you think I am clumsy?” Yakumo was surprised and said what was right on her mind.

“No. Y-you are,” Lee blamed his stutters on the exhausting exercises he was doing. He wanted to say nice things and then he was afraid his tongue would betray him. He recalled when he used to walk around, expressing his devoted and youthful love for Sakura, things were so easy. And now this feeling he held, which was stronger and truly devoted and youthful, was so complicated and so hard to put into words. He definitely needed to loan some courage from his younger self. He swallowed and said, “You look graceful when you are dancing. I am so awed.”

“So it’s not weird that I just came from nowhere and danced?”

“No.” He paused, looking at Yakumo attentively. There was so much more than a simple deny. He was encouraged. He was grateful. He was afraid everything was just a dream. He was happy. He remembered he used to wonder if things like this would even happen. And then he laughed.

“What?” Yakumo felt panicked. She pondered about what could be the funny thing about her and decided to no long regard Sai as a family. “Is there paints on my face?”

“No, I mean, yes, you’ve got paints on your face,” Lee gave her his towel, “Here. You must have come to meet me right after you finished working. I appreciate that. I was only laughing because Sakura once told me I can’t stand on my hand all day long and wish a girl would join me one second and become my happy ending. And then you happened. That made me laugh. Wait, forget about that, I totally forgot I shouldn’t mention the name Haruno Sakura on my dates. I mean, if you don’t mind considering this a date.”

“I don’t mind—” Yakumo answered out of nature as she wouldn't mind anything Lee did. But then, she thought she caught something. “Wait, Lee, why would you ask me out on a date? Do you think I could be your happy ending?” And she felt bold.

“Yakumo,” Lee collected his confidence and his courage, “I do. I really want a happy ending with you. Can you be my girlfriend?”

“This is my answer.” She kissed him on his cheek, which she had been imagining since she first learned about his existence. She didn’t stop a second and wondered if things were going too fast. She didn’t worry if he would think she was easy. At the moment, she knew both of them had let their hearts decide their fate.

---

Spotted: I never paid enough attention on any artist aside from Pale Painter, but now I have to prepare myself to worship Bowlcut Babe and his artsy gal every now and then. Ladies and gentlemen, we welcome KY to our navigation page, alright? You may PM me your preferable nicknames for her and I would hold a poll along with a give-away. Details are available for registered users exclusively at here. Why do I bother to care about them? More youthful celebration, more family member added to little SM’s list, more sticky but cute kisses, more possible children name bets, and more love geometry chance. All yelled my name literally!

 

For starters,

Team: LR&KY

Mission: Kissing in the rain

Status: Complete

 

Only she would be willing to continue training in the rain with him, so I guess she totes deserve it. Deserve them.

 

Can you believe it? They were the first one doing that? Too many praises or fangirling for US, HN, NS or dense UN definitely did zero good to our village. #NeverImpressed

 

This week is also the week AC will get married. Again, YI was crossed off from the bridesmaid list so I wonder what the birthday girl would show us this time. For NS, it was a last sassy and classy dance. I always know she loves AC even more. So excited! Because it’s her friends that are gonna be the groomsmen and bridesmaids, my camera and I will definitely capture the chance to shoot Rai It-gossips. Make sure you tune in to your one and only source into the scandalous lives of Kumo’s elites.

 

For the sake of efficiency and pissing me off, HN decided it would also be the day he made his girlfriend HT. That was so no fun, you know, when his cousin had spared the ceremony earlier and he wouldn’t show off their clan luxurious style, either. Nevertheless, we all know exes are the best shows. I did manage to sit at the drama-guaranteed table with Fan Girl, Princess Pig, Panda-sama and Pale Painter. Don’t forget that My Always-Deer Friend, Dog Dude, the future Mrs. Kaze, Snow Eyes, and Hawk Jerk would also be there. Yeah, we are missing Prince Fox-frog and Best Forehead bc hey are the maid of honor and the best man. Wow, changing partners?!

 

Kind Reminder: If you wanna join the joy, you should wake up at 5 A.M. and hurried to Kumo in the morning and prevent from drunkenness and arrive in Konoha by 5 P.M. Since it’s also Crybaby and Oneesan’s anniversary, Team Gossip will get Suna at around 10 P.M. The last one is not a public event. Get your ninja on for your safety.

 

I personally take that as a challenge specifically for me. Let it come! I also laid my eyes on Doll-san when he also made his in-law-to-be visit recently. Or I will prefer calling it an Auntie/Uncle-to-be meeting. Seriously, she’s so young, man. Your sister never worried about her age, so why did you have to hurry it up?

 

UN and U-HH’s kid is supposed to be due next month. We wish them best luck! I think if I were the Hokage, I would make the best of it and we will sell stamps, mugs, and other souvenirs with their pictures in Konoha. Tax-free! Don’t you feel it is a shame that we don’t have Prince Fox-frog or Panda-sama key chains?

 

Whenever we give Snow Eyes some screen time, we have to keep her insignificant teammates in mind. Felicity Smoak is still with the teacher and they are having some decent dates. Unlike their comrades, they know you can be intimate and have fun without checking in a room. I came across them last week at a book fair. Yeah, I read. A lot. Have you ever headcanoned any kisses behind a book? They made it virtual for you. The book was titled Cuteness, I guess. Who cares anyway? We know they were playing adorkable. IK and YI, on the other hand, went to the SP Amusement Park. Don’t worry. They knew they weren’t five as they take those times supposed to be spent on carousels to improve their makeout skills. Rated M.

 

Aside from being a jerk, US had popped the question! Let me quote the one sentence melting my heart. Rebuild my clan with me. OMG alpha males are my favorite! I hope all those heartbroken girls over there could take this news civilly. We do not need more ungrateful corpses-to-be visiting Konoha. Thank you very much.

 

Now to think of that, Clone US is not off limits! Try with him! If LR could find his true love after I paid him a big shoutout, then I think I am just doing him a favor. He couldn’t be all bad when he had finished all the reading materials assigned by Mask-sama, right? Let see who will join that ship first, YI or UK? What? You say they are taken? Geez, shame on you for your no-fun life. Be open-minded.

 

Last thing for today, I am also not Uzumaki Naruto. I thought Lee Rock was your worst guess. What’s with this one? I am smart. I have a PhD. I am good at math. I am never a dobe. I hate orange. Please, spare me-dattebayo.

 

Humor: Okay. I think now is the time I shared the most hilarious one. That is Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke. Not saying they can’t be but seriously why that would be brought up. I repeat again Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke of Konoha. Duh, they are both from Konoha, shouldn’t all you others mind your own business? It was like saying Darui and C of Kumo should get married. Wait, that was also discussed about. Hello, let me remind you, we needed a baby boom, which after that breakup wave we didn’t really have much hope for. I would love to imagine those weird suggestions were made because of the obvious sexual tension between those pairs. Then again why not just let the sparkles grow on their own? For me, I will spend time looking carefully for more clues. Wait for a #Gocha moment!

 

You know your chakra eats gossips.

Kunais and Shurikens,

Gossip Kunoichi

---

“Are you saying we were all wrong?” Ino couldn’t believe what Sai just said.

“Yes, Gorgeous.” Sai smiled proudly. “That’s why Konoha needs me.”

“So the Land of Bread is never a threat.” Shikamaru felt a sudden annoyance. All those troublesome works were wasted.

“Yes, my Deer Genius Nara.” Sai still stayed cool.

“Then what was the deal with that man almost raping Ino?” Neji asked a real question.

“Hey, you are not supposed to talk—” Ino wanted to stop him but what was done was done.

“Oh, do you mean Mr. Bagel?” Sai answered, “Do you know he is gay? Not Sasu-gay gay, but a real gay. He was just a decoy. He was as scared as you. Thanks to your perfect team work, he didn’t have to see you naked.”

“A decoy for what?” Now Ino wasn’t just shocked but also furious.

“To make the best espionage team from Konoha believe his country was corrupted and needed their rescue.” Sai shared his knowledge, taking a sip from his cup.

“Then why did I have an afternoon tea with the landlady?” Naruto was also not impressed. At all. “I told her so many stories about Jiraya-sensei, about Nagato, about Obito, and about my parents. And she acted so grumpy all the way. I almost lost hope.”

“Naruto-kun, I thought you were meeting the landlord.” Hinata’s smile looked terrifying at the time.

“Well, reign changed, I guess. Funny, right?” Naruto could feel some cold sweats on his back.

“I thought grumpiness is your favorite.” Sai looked at Naruto in confusion, “They probably felt the same. She told me she really wanted to befriend you.”

“You had an afternoon tea with that old lady?” Sasuke didn’t feel like letting Sai continuing. “Of course, you did.”

“You’ve met her, too?” Sakura wondered. She didn’t think there was anything wrong going on between Sasuke and that old lady but it never hurt asking.

“Suigetsu suggested we disguised as drug addicts to get in touch with the drug dealers in the purpose of finding out what those corpses you found might have taken.” Sasuke explained. For one time, he listened to Suigetsu and it proved he should never.

“Drug dealer?” Sai asked, “Do you mean Mr. Toast? He did mention that some weird-dressed emos had been bothering him with some strange codes. At first, he thought you were some Jashin followers. Then he felt you were moody and spoiled teeny brats that he preferred ignoring.”

“But Karin said she definitely had caught that man taking an injection from time to time.” Sasuke refused to accept that ridiculous fact.

“It’s medicated. Gay, can you at least pity that poor man? He was diagnosed with a disease and encountered some horrifying foreigners out of nowhere.” Sai apparently could sympathize with the people of Land of Bread.

“But the corpses. The corpses were all so strange. Some of them were definitely poisoned. Others were irrecognizable. I also couldn’t tell when they died or how. And the number was abnormal as well.” Sakura wouldn’t buy Sai’s explanation, either.

“And the ambush almost killed Akamaru?” Kiba also objected, “The excessive smoke blocking Hinata’s sight? The poison killing Shino’s bugs? You can’t tell me they are not vicious and they want to make friends.”

“Why do you people have so fat egos?” Sai sighed.

“Did you just say fat? But for me, kids would have died in the mining accident. The powerful force didn’t even bother interfering. They went on killing and plundering.”

“Hold on. I said fat but not to you. An accident was an accident. You and Lee left too fast. They didn’t even know you are Konoha nins and couldn’t have thanked you. And they don’t have an army. Didn’t any one of you check the treaty they signed? Gorgeous? Genius? Where's the Ino-Shika-Cho? They wouldn’t risk violating it. What you saw was probably the theatrical troupe.” Hardly surviving the Ino-Shika-Cho he accidentally provoked, Sai spoke slowly, “Dog, what did you expect? Them doing nothing toward an infiltration team? Akamaru was so large and they were horrified. The smoke and the poison were coming from the incineration plant. They have put a sign telling people not to get near. Couldn’t you three read? About the corpses, Ugly, of course they were abnormal. They put them there to draw attention. They even dug up graves to gather more and to make you get into knots. Otherwise, how would Konoha care to notice Land of Bread?”

“Okay, suppose what you are saying is all true,” Tenten said, arm crossed, “What do they want? Seriously? Some people are working on reconstruction here. What’s the problem with them?” The others showed an expression of approval to her question.

“They idolize us. Okay? We are Konoha 13. We are like supernovas.” Sai was like how come these idiots couldn’t have made it out already.

“Doesn’t sound convincing to me.” Tenten rolled her eyes, trying to argue more. Neji, by her side, however, put a hand on shoulder, telling her not to.

“I guess I can believe you for now. Why? Because you come back safe and sound and seem to have a lot of fun there.” Rarely getting the chance to talk on behalf of his crew, Shino went on, “Can you tell us how you found out?”

“I arrived there, telling the gate guards I am from Konoha and they took me to the landlady. By the way, she’s older than us but no less beautiful.” Sakura and Ino exchanged a look and both gave the senseless ANBU captain a fist on his head. Sai seemed unharmed, though, and kept going on, “That hurt. You violent kuno-bitches. She told me she was afraid Naruto didn’t get what she was conveying but seeing me, she believed Konoha still has some smart people and has agreed to befriend. And she introduced me to some officials, who later showed me around the country.”

“And then why it took you extra three days to complete your mission?” Tenten wasn’t sold. She stepped closer and questioned.

“I was sent there to decide whether or not to assassin the leader, so I have to wait and see. And then when I was about to return, she invited me to her birthday gala. How could I decline such a nice gesture?” Sai answered.

“Then where are Lee and Yakumo?” Tenten still wouldn’t let go, “They are supposed to be your backups because you didn’t know the definition of keeping in touch with your directors. And now they are nowhere to be found!” She was worried about her teammate and his newly-acquired girlfriend.

“Don’t worry about them.” Sai took out his tablet, which a website was shown on. “Gossip Kunoich just found them. I believe you would like to join your teammate at Konoha Hot Springs & Recreations, right? I heard they had installed some innovative facilities.”

“I won’t even think of it. I believe Lee and Yakumo are there for swimming.” Tenten laughed, “And that’s gonna be exhausting.”

“At least, some couple never loses their passions.” Ino also beamed, “Look at Shika and Temari.”

“Maybe we should all join them and have a sneak peak!” Naruto was planning on a prank again. “Anyone in?”

 

When their friends were either agreeing or opposing a Punk’d moment, Lee and Yakumo had got ready in their swimming suits. Lee bore in mind that he should watch on Yakumo but before he could tell her they could take it easy, Yakumo had already been gone. He dived into the water, following her but not outstripping. When they reached the end of the lane, Yakumo got up first. And then Lee got up and was met with a kiss on his lips right after he took a breath.

 

Springtime of youth would fleet any second but if one keeps their hearts young and fresh, there’s no end to it.

---

Another English fanfiction! And does anyone catch me scattering some SaiInos here and there?